Honey Don't!

This is a movie that very literally has no point. At any given point in time there are 3 plots circulating around it. Plot #1 what honey is doing, which seems to be some kind of version of being a P. I. but not really doing much in the way of investigating besides for getting nowhere fast with it. #2 What the pastor is doing, from what I can see he's got something shady going on which is a mix of some sort with his sex based church. And #3 the actual movie plot which is anyone's guess since there's no real way to make heads or tails of it. And that's about it. I wish I could tell you that they all run together in the end and make some grand reveal, they don't.

5/10 good acting, no idea what these plots are suppose to be, this is something to watch if you're bored and want to waste some time.

"Honey Don't!" exemplifies the frustrating phenomenon of wasted potential. What begins as a promising neo-noir with Margaret Qualley delivering a genuinely engaging performance as hard-boiled private eye Honey O'Donahue quickly dissolves into narrative incoherence that would make even the most patient viewer check their watch.

Ethan Coen's direction starts strong, establishing an intriguing mystery around church-connected deaths in small-town California. The early scenes crackle with the kind of sharp dialogue and atmospheric tension you'd expect from a Coen production. Qualley, Plaza, and Evans all commit fully to their roles, bringing genuine chemistry and wit to their interactions.

But somewhere around the half hour mark, the film completely loses its way. Plot threads multiply without resolution, the comedy becomes increasingly forced, and the central mystery devolves into confusing nonsense. By the third act, you're left wondering if Coen forgot what story he was trying to tell.

The film's "lesbian B-movie" concept had real potential, but execution matters more than concepts. "Honey Don't!" proves that even talented actors can't salvage a script that abandons its own premise.

I just finished watching Honey Don't, and honestly, I left the theater scratching my head. The whole experience was a strange mix of sad, pointless, and-if I'm being blunt-sometimes flat-out boring. It felt like the film was trying to say something profound, but the tone was so off that it missed its mark entirely.

I truly don't know what audience they were aiming for. Too heavy-handed to be light drama, too scattered to be meaningful, and too dull to be entertaining. Characters drifted through scenes without much purpose, and while the story had the bones of something emotional, it never built to anything worth caring about.

The pacing didn't help either. There were long stretches where I caught myself checking the time, waiting for something-anything-to happen. Instead, it kept circling back to the same dreary mood that never paid off.

In the end, I can see why the studio released this movie in the dead zone of late August, right before Labor Day weekend. It feels like one of those "let's just get it out there and move on" kind of releases. Honey Don't isn't the worst film I've ever seen, but it's definitely one I won't be remembering-or recommending-anytime soon.

First, I'll start with what I liked. The title cards, while lengthy was cleverly filmed and incorporated into the city's skyline.

The acting itself was also good those who are aloof remained aloof. Everyone remained in character throughout.

Now for a bit a negativity. While some nude scenes, I would argue, do push the story forward, the other half are gratuitous and didn't really help with the story line.

The ending however might not be everyone's cup of tea. Without giving away too much of the film I'll say that in retrospect too many movies end the movie with on a closed loop, so in that sense it's refreshing.

Say what you will about the Coen brothers. I usually don't. But at least you can tell when a movie is made by them. This one you can't, aside from the usual gratuitous violence.

Chris Evans sermon is quite funny, and it's by far the best scene in the film. Most scenes he's in warrant a laugh at some point, but nothing else in the movie (labeled a comedy somehow) is funny. Has Ethan never talked to a human before? I do not know how the actors got through one take without laughing. The writing is atrocious and non-sensical. The movie as a whole felt like Ethan Coen was personally offended that 40's hardboiled detective movies didn't have enough lesbians, floor brains, and genital references, and that it was his job to reconcile that. Aubrey Plaza is one of the best actresses working today and her performance was cringe inducing. Margaret Qualley was doing a xanaxed Humphrey Bogaert impression and my goodness if these actors had had any level of self awareness that they were in a terrible movie and leaned into it, it could have been funny. They played it so straight (gay) to yawn-inducing results. Has to be one of the worst ensemble performances in recent memory. The movie doesn't crack 90 minutes even with a 7 minute long dialogue-free opening and over 5 minute long credits. I do not know how they can get away with selling a ticket to that in theaters. You are not given enough time to learn or care anything about these caricatures, though it's so inept at establishing any premise that even if we got 4 hours of this it would just be multiplying a fraction by 2 over 2. Sure the number is different, but it still means the same thing.

Honey, you got a big storm comin!