The Very Sad Reality of Remakes
Though this one wasn't the box office hit its original was, it still made back 25x its budget, when we have beautiful, terrifying films that sometimes just break even. Backpacking on a story that wasn't even theirs, with characters i'm not even sure we're meant to care about, and decision making that will have you rolling your eyes into the back of your soul, The Blair Witch falls flat on its back, and doesn't get back up.
The movie has its moments, sure, where we are truly wondering what is going on in those mystical woods. It took the idea of the neverending night from many movies in the past but I wasn't even sure if I liked that, as it didn't happen in the first movie at all, but it is a definite visceral scare to think about an everlasting night so at least they tried.
I didn't like the whole medusa idea like if you look at it you die... Hmm then what were those guys doing on coffin rock with their entrails gashed out of them all tied together?
THE DECISIONS THESE GUYS MAKE LOL STOP IT. "I think my seesters in there!" 17 years later in an old broken down house after watching a video where she clearly died... Worst part about this movie was the most scares you got were always jump scares from the people scaring each other because apparently they walk silently and don't know how to tell their friends they're there. Please stop with the blair witch remakes unless you can really nail it without the gimmicks, I want this hour and a half of my life back.
The movie has its moments, sure, where we are truly wondering what is going on in those mystical woods. It took the idea of the neverending night from many movies in the past but I wasn't even sure if I liked that, as it didn't happen in the first movie at all, but it is a definite visceral scare to think about an everlasting night so at least they tried.
I didn't like the whole medusa idea like if you look at it you die... Hmm then what were those guys doing on coffin rock with their entrails gashed out of them all tied together?
THE DECISIONS THESE GUYS MAKE LOL STOP IT. "I think my seesters in there!" 17 years later in an old broken down house after watching a video where she clearly died... Worst part about this movie was the most scares you got were always jump scares from the people scaring each other because apparently they walk silently and don't know how to tell their friends they're there. Please stop with the blair witch remakes unless you can really nail it without the gimmicks, I want this hour and a half of my life back.
- xeliasx
- 11 may 2017