American Sasquatch

Had I known what I was in for, as I sat down to watch the 2020 horror movie "American Sasquatch", I would have put the movie down like yesterday's garbage and ventured on to something else without even looking back.

This was a combination of 'found footage' 'vlogging', two things that I truly dislike with a vengeance, oh and throw in some anthology as well. So yeah, directors Mathew Fisher and Tony Newton utterly failed to entertain me with this travesty of a horror movie titled "American Sasquatch".

The acting performances in the movie were nothing to write home about. Needless to say that I wasn't familiar with a single actor or actress on the cast list.

Visually then you're in for nothing that you couldn't film yourself with a home video camera.

Do yourself a favor and don't waste 75 minutes on this dumpster fire of something that was supposed to be a movie meant for entertaining. Some of us suffered through this rubbish in lesser or greater extend, so you don't have to; you're quite welcome.

The movie's cover was actually the best part about the ordeal. And that cover over-sells the movie by a landslide.

My rating of "American Sasquatch" lands on a very, very generous one out of ten stars.

American Sasquatch appears to be a bunch of shorts sloppily jammed together to make a "feature length" (75 minutes) movie. It starts with ten minutes of people talking to the camera including Shawn C. Phillips who is occasionally funny but often overly exuberant and annoying. He brags about his DVD/blu-ray collection which we don't see. It's been shown in other movies and seems to be mostly common films on DVD with a few more obscure ones thrown in. We then get a found footage short with people in the woods arguing and little happening. There's a brief offscreen creature attack so they didn't have to put any effort into actually showing a 'squatch.

The next story is a guy walking through the woods, setting up his camp, going to sleep and then waking up. After awakening he is almost immediately dispatched by what I presume is some sort of sasquatch/bigfoot. You can see it in shadows and it's clearly a guy with long hair with normal clothes on. A small bit of gore is this parts only real value but at least it's not as annoying as the earlier parts. The last story is a father and son going hunting in the woods during winter. Not much happens until the son is torn in half by a sasquatch. It's a hilariously bad effect with cartoon blood splattering on the camera. At least we see a real sasquatch costume even if it's quite goofy. There's a brief "shock" ending to this short. This part is probably the best by default of actually showing a monster suit. This is a mostly worthless collection of shorts with little happening, almost no actual monster action, little gore and no real humor. A good candidate for worst "movie" of all time.

My daughter made me watch this abysmal film. Please do not waste your time watching this garbage. The effort by the writers and directors was nonexistent. The monster is a dude in a trash bag with a chewbaca mask. There was no consistency to this this trash. College films with no budgets did more. Everyone involved in this film should be banned from any cinema work going forward. The new version of the Wolf Man is a better Sasquatch story. Ultimately do not waste your time in this movie. I cannot stress that enough. Watch paint dry, watch ants, anything other than this movie. I wish I can get my time back.