La mujer biónica

Firstly and foremost, I have to point out that I am a big fan of the new Galactica, although I don't personally see why that should apply to the reception of a separate show. And yes, I know there are considerable crossovers in writing and acting talent, but the show still deserves to be evaluated on its own.

Secondly, rose-tinted memories aside, remember that old seventies shows have not generally stood the test of time. They were strictly formulaic, beset by comedy fashion and hairstyle, and the bionic woman itself was a cheap knock off of its masculine origin show. For God's sake, they varied the implants just so she would be different to Steve Austin.

Of course, restrictions of formula still apply. An audience that has been gobbling up 24, Lost and Prison Break for the last few years now has higher expectations of a new show. Better production values, more stylised dialogue and a greater sense of mythology pervade these shows. And Heroes has pushed the benchmark out about as far as it can go.

So any new pilot on any network is going to come under serious scrutiny. And I think Bionic Woman holds up. I will concede that the script for the pilot was a little ropey - I had the distinct feeling a pilot movie script had been seriously hacked down to size. But the performances were strong enough to hold it, and the photography and visual design showed some innovation.

The biggest problem with series (as opposed to movies) is that it can take much longer for a show to build up the momentum it needs to create its identity. The Bionic Woman had always been a family show, just like The Six Million Dollar Man. If the new Bionic Woman is going to establish itself as the same, then it will have to pitched just right.

So it gets six out of ten. Better than average. Better than a lot of shows that somehow continue, but worse than many who have fallen by the wayside. Lets just hope that NBC give Jamie Summers time to show us who she really is.

Whether it's a hit or not, for me it has already wiped another laughable 70s show off the map. Maybe they could update The Fall Guy, only it would be about a CGI artist who used his power of computer graphics to help a different woman every week...

Network: NBC; Genre: Sci-Fi Action; Content Rating: TV-PG (for comic book violence); Available: DVD; Perspective: Contemporary (star range: 1 - 4);

Seasons Reviewed: Series (1 season)

"Bionic Woman" barrels onto the fall 2007 schedule with a typhoon of hype that it doesn't deserve and outspoken armchair critic repulsion that it also probably doesn't deserve. Worst show ever? Hardly. As with "Cavemen", the internet rebellion is on overdrive again to take something down.

A remake of the 1976 series of the same name (with a slogan taken from the 1975 series of a different name), NBC's "Bionic Woman" updates Jamie Summers and her ear, arm and legs (and installs a bionic eye) for a new generation. Now, that special effects have reached the technological point that they can be pulled off on TV cheaply without looking so, 70s sci-fi is fair game for any high-tech re-imagining.

I'll admit, I was taken with these visual effects in the first episode, when Jamie (the bodacious Michelle Ryan, perfectly up for all the action) escapes from the lab that re-assembled her and runs through a forest. We actually see her legs moving, instead of the blurred Tom Welling that dashes through "Smallville". Soon the pilot climaxes in a blurry bionic-woman-on-bionic-woman fight scene shot with such shot cuts it's guaranteed to pull you out of the action with it's trickery. As is all of the show's fighting. We can make a woman run at lightening speed look real but we can't make a fight scene look like it wasn't created entirely in the editing suite.

But let's talk about "Smallville". On that comic book series the action sequences are creatively constructed and bring to a head the emotional strands of the story. The acting, at least from the supporting players, is quite good and the show is a cinematic production, visually restrained and musically appropriated. "Bionic" is a cold, shallow exercise in frenzied fight scenes and time-tested shoot-outs.

The show doesn't have an original bone in it's body; and not just because it's a remake. Like any big budget production it plays everything safe from soup to nuts, following even it's own formula strictly. Jamie works for a secret government agency, led by Miguel Ferrer (still playing the gruff but concerned team leader from "Crossing Jordan"), who sends her out on assignments to foil terrorists across the country and around the world. It's "Chuck" without the quirky humor, "Heroes" without the invention, "Smallville" without the heart. It may be apples and oranges but look at the ho-hum episode in which Jamie returns to college for an assignment and compare that to a similar and far more inspired episode of "Chuck" where that show's unlikely secret agent returns to college.

I recognize this is all criticism you either know already or just assumed from the show's status as a remake. But you'd have to see it to know how just about everything down to the studs doesn't work. It's wildly over-directed and to counter-act that it's blandly scripted. It is a hollow-to-the-core Hollywood production, mechanically assemble out of condescension and laziness, betting that viewers will sit slack-jawed through the 50 minutes of routine, talky set-up just to see Jamie bust out a bionic feat of strength and save the day in the final 5 minutes. That's all we'll get and we'll be lucky to get it.

The biggest insult? For my money it's the way the show takes "Breath Me", a song that lent such beauty and such an emotional punch in the gut to the "Six Feet Under" finale and just slap-dash lays it over a training montage. Heresy!

* ½ / 4

I don't know.

I was expecting a lot and it didn't deliver.

The one thing I do miss is the special effects noise that was made when Lee Majors and Lindsey Wagner ran. You know - Dadadadadadadada.

I was waiting for it and nothing.

And this BW seemed a little too upset at her boyfriend for saving her life - you would think should be grateful for being alive and put back together.

She could of been dead and/or no legs, arm, eye or ear.

I hope this show improves, if not - gone!!!!

I don't know - maybe I was looking for something and just wasn't there.

They seem to build on the characters of others beside Jaime. You know, she was like an after thought to the story.

Let's wait and see..

I loved the idea of this remake and I think the actress is good enough to do it. But I am left feeling very disappointed.

It is almost like the writer had a list of cliché ideas next to him and ticked them off one by one. The whole 1st episode is infected with old ideas.

The one thing that really annoyed me was the mis-timed pace of it. One minute she is with her sis and the next she is having a pointless fight on a roof.

There was no time taken at all to develop her character and show the bionic transformation. This just seemed to be an inconvenience and got in the way of the first fight scene. It is almost like this programme is targeted for the Playstation Nation who are too impatient to sit down and watch a story build so it just whizzes past anything of substance.

Too fast, too cliché and nothing new here at all. Pity. I am struggling to recommend this.

This show seems a little too youth oriented as far as the lead character - and is just not too interesting. There is a great storyline here, but the show doesn't seem to be able to utilize it well enough to be fascinating and captivating.

The series is basically about an early twenty-something girl who is in a bad auto accident. She is reconstituted with bio-engineered enhancements and emerges with extraordinary abilities.

The only problem is that she's not very interesting to watch. There is no spark - the scenes often drag on without ever building suspense or intrigue -- or even any sci-fi appeal. Plus, the character is a little too young to be the sole focus for a general audience show. The music, as if too back this up, is what you typically get in teen dramas.

Unfortunately, there's not much to recommend here. Check it out if you're curious, but my suggestion is to pass on it.