Larry the Cable Guy: Health Inspector

I walked into the theater hoping I would get some good laughs. I went with my friend who worships Larry's humor. I left the theater disappointed. This movie is filled with the same joke over and over again. Basically overdone toilet humor. I have nothing against the humor, it's just the same jokes repeated over and over again. Nothing new or inventive here. Larry's humor was not creative. Just diarrhea jokes over and over throughout the whole entire movie! And that was the whole running gimmick! It became rather boring. This is a simple film which had the potential to be funny but destroyed it with horrible acting and boring humor.

Plato contends that the soul is distinct from the body and is capable of maintaining a separate existence from it. Aristotle, in contrast, feels that body and soul are two aspects of the same underlying substance; form and matter.

The dualist position has reigned supreme. However, by espousing a distinct type of substance for the mind, dualists invite the question: What is it that makes it possible for two contraries to interact? I've always had a soft spot for dualism, but after seeing the first 5 minutes of Larry the Cable Guy's "Health Inspector" I've fully adopted an identity theorist's approach to the existence, or lack thereof, of the human soul.

It seems highly improbably, if not impossible, that an immortal mind could promote, as an artistic expression of itself, the sordid tale of this so-called "Health Inspector." It's nothing more than a farce: man as some sort of pure, critically thinking substance existing in a platonic heaven where a universal Cable Guy sits, perpetually gitting-r-done!

As a fan of Larry the Cable Guy and the Blue Collar Comedy Tour, my husband and I really wanted to see this movie. As a matter of fact, when we heard the release date, we ensured to plan an evening around going to the theater to see this movie. I've enjoyed watching Larry the Cable Guy over the years and I knew that this movie would not be Oscar worthy, or one of the best comedies I have ever seen, but I thought it would at least be entertaining - but to our surprise, it wasn't. We were turned off within the first 10 minutes of the movie and forced ourselves to sit through the remaining 80 minutes. Usually, just hearing Larry talk is enough to make some laugh, but by the end of the movie, we even tired of that. Unfortunately, I think we will be a little gun shy in seeing any future Larry the Cable Guy movies, unless of course, , he is teamed up with the rest of the Blue Collar cast and he is doing his stand-up act. This movie isn't even worthy of watching on DVD, unless you want to hear fart gags for an hour and a half.

Unlike the very first reviewer, I confess that I never played college baseball with Larry the Cable Guy at Boston College or anywhere else. I did have a pretty tough week this week, and in celebration of the fact that I work some long and crazy hours I did my every other week Friday Matinée movie expecting some really crude, baseless, and thoroughly stupid humor.

I was not disappointed.

Larry the Cable Guy: Health Inspector is a reasonably competent movie vehicle for Dan "Larry the Cable Guy" Whitney, allowing for the fact that it is rife with all the flatulent, politically incorrect, crude, redneck, and every other kind of socially unredeeming humor we have come to know him for within his solo stand-up and "Blue Collar Comedy Tour" career.

The whole crux of this film revolves around Larry's job as a restaurant health department inspector who happens to be offending virtually every one in his path and screwing up at his job. To correct his ways or end his career, he is allied with a new partner, the virtually hermaphrodic Amy Butlin (played by suitably hermaphrodic nerd-turned-comedienne Iris Bahr). What ensues is a caper in which Larry finds a love interest, belittles his partner, laughs at his retarded neighbor, abuses a phony paraplegic, wrestles a uni-browed daughter of a crooked restaurateur, degrades all manner of human life, all while trying to solve the case of serial food poisoning. We are also treated to what Jerry Mathers looks like at the end of his career and to what became of Thomas F. Wilson (remember Biff Tannen?) as if he actually had a career as a quasi-straight (don't you think that's funny, I called Biff straight?) guy for Larry's gaffs.

Sound interesting? Of course not, but every crude one-liner in Larry's repertoire (new and old) is balanced against a sometimes funny sometimes lame plot. There is enough of "Cable Guy" humor and off-beat timing to laugh at, even some things the P.C. police would send you straight to Hell for. Ample fresh material exists to keep the not-so-funny lines from keeping the average Cable Guy fan from disliking this movie.

Anyone expecting any more or less of Health Inspector is probably not a Larry the Cable Guy fan, and certainly should not see this film. If you are, however, and you just want to see about 90 minutes of absolutely insolent yet funny bathroom-style garbage disguised as humor, then by all means "Git 'er DUN" and see this film. It could be worse, of course, but comeonn….it's Larry The Cable Guy, NOT Shakespeare.

4 out of 10 for a comedy like this means it is B-style humor worth seeing if you understand the brand of humor being presented. I did take a shower afterward though.

Normally when a new bad movie comes out, it usually sky rockets up the bottom 100 list. This is mainly just a trendy thing. You Got Served, Bloodrayne and From Justin to Kelly were among these unlucky ones. Oh sure they were bad movies alright, terrible movies to be blunter. But when you looked at the movies like Red Zone Cuba, Gigli and of course Manos, you couldn't really rate them as that bad.

NOT THIS TIME

Think of the most horrible, hateful put down you could ever attach to anyone and anything and it still wouldn't do Larry The Cable Guy justice. That's right folks. 40 years on and finally, Manos is now the world number two on the chart. This movie is the biggest piece of s**t to ever stink up the theatre. It is so jaw droppingly, blood-boilingly bad that you wouldn't even serve it to your most hated emnemy.

Not only is Larry The Cable Guy the single worst most horrible movie of all time, but it is the spawn of the single worst most horrible idea of all time. The plot involves a series of food poisonings at the city's best restaurants, with the All City Top Chef contest just days away. It's up to Larry and Butlin to figure out who's sabotaging the competition, even if it means taking on the breast-obsessed mayor.

Got that folks? It's another toilet humor film which sucks! And it's another film directed by a first timer (Trent Cooper)! See Deuce Bigalow for reference! In the first five minutes of the redneck comedian's film debut, we see Larry urinating on himself in the shower, flashing his butt crack, having a flatulence attack in front of his boss, and referencing the smell of "strawberry douche." At this point I turn unto God and ask "Why?" Why does Hollywood keep doing this with impunity!

Trent Cooper is only there to keep the movie in focus (he even fails that at times) and to make certain there are enough fart jokes to keep the overlong running time rumbling. Seriously, you could make DVD chapters out of the number of times Larry -- or anybody, really -- makes with the southern thunder. That is how awful this movie is. It can't even save itself with fart jokes.

Larry The Cable Guy is truly the worst movie of all time. It should be driven to a quiet spot, forced to kneel down and be shot through the head. That'll learn it!

NEVER WATCH THIS MOVIE.