Bottoms Up

"Bottoms Up" definitely deserved it's fate. It's an unfunny mess.

Jason Mewes plays Owen, who is a bartender. His Dad's bar is about to close because of money problems. Then out of the blue, Owen sees there's a "King of The Bar" contest in California. He applies, but doesn't win, and now he needs to get the money fast. He meets Lisa Mancini (Hilton) and blackmails her to be popular.

It's a very stupid plot, with the choppiest editing I've seen in awhile. There's no buildup, or segue into scenes, There are plot holes and there is dialogue missing. And the "Golden Palace.Com" plug was the most shameless plug ever. "Hey man, I have an idea, let's win some money at Golden Palace.Com!" says one character.

Also why does Paris have blonde hair on the cover, but she's a brunette in the film? Jason Mewes was trying his hardest to breathe life into his character, but the script let him down. Paris Hilton was also trying... but not too hard though. She's basically playing herself. It's funny when other characters call her "A whore". Truth in jest perhaps? Let's not mince words: "Bottoms Up" is terrible.

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I've noticed a goof in this film.

Paris Hilton is listed as one of the actors in the move which is strange as she's so wooden I thought someone had thrown a chair onto the screen.

Possibly the worst movie I've ever had the unfortunate experience to see...! Why people hire Paris Hilton and think she will draw a crowd is beyond me. I think its because these people are genuinely brain dead and have no talent to speak of.

Clearly a movie bank rolled by people who have too much cash and too little ideas.

So lets pull together - mail your mates and make this the no1 worst movie of all time to show the idiots who come up with this stuff were sick of it.

I love bad movies. I do, I love watching them and laughing at their absurdity. This was a bad movie that I couldn't enjoy.

Maybe it was because I couldn't get passed my previous conceptions of the two leads. To me Paris Hilton is always Paris Hilton, for better or worse I cannot get "That's Hot" and Tinkerbelle and well everything else associated with her public persona. And Jason Mewes...he's Jay, I see him and I wonder where Silent Bob is. (As a side note Kevin Smith is in the film, although not silent, thank God, he's probably the funniest person in it!) And here I was thinking it was impossible to have worse chemistry than Hayden Christiansen and Natalie Portman in Episodes II and III...Oh boy was I wrong. Mewes and Hilton make them look like Katherine Hepburn and Spencer Tracy. Not that they don't try their best. I can't help but think that this character Owen is closer to the real Mewes than Jay...He's silly and goofy but also a little sweet and incredibly loyal. As for Paris, she seems very uncomfortable as Lisa, which is strange because this is not a person I have ever seen feeling uncomfortable about anything.

Now on to the supporting cast, who I must say, are excellent. Like I said before Smith, as Owen's lazy farting best friend back home, is hysterical. The guy who plays Lisa's boyfriend Hayden is great. Also Owen's Uncle Earl is hysterical, as are the guys in Hayden's "posse" This is definitely worth the rental, but except crap...even from crap...

I've been a big Jason Mewes fan since watching "Clerks" back in 1994 and have followed his career by watching the "View Askewniverse" films for the past decade, so I was excited to see Jason playing a different character than the one he's been playing all these years, but unfortunately this film was tainted with Paris Hilton's atrocious acting, which unfortunately spoils the whole film. The premise of the story resembles something you'd expect to see on Nickelodeon "The son goes to Hollywood to save his Fathers restaurant and falls in love." If you're a Jason Mewes fan watch this film he was really good in it, but if you not, or never heard of him, avoid this film like the plague it's truly remarkable how bad this film is.

I recently rented out this film as an act to cover up all the boring lives me and my brain have had during the extended holidays, and this film, I hoped would cheer me up. Wrong.

I have seen more than enough films about people who want to do what this film does, and that was the first Mistake I made during my selection. The second one was, seeing Paris Hilton starring in it, because I've see, from House of Wax that she doesn't try hard to make her characters look well up on screen. The final mistake I made, was not checking on what critics had said.

Do not go rent this film because you will be disappointed.

1/10 (And that's being generous)