Icebreaker

I'm glad this was the only thing on when I was attempting to avoid being responsible...I couldn't stomach much more than five minutes of it (so I got back to work...boo hoo...) though I left it playing just to remind myself of what a real piece of cinematic trash looks like.

I'd like to know who financed this since I could use a loan for a real movie ha! ha! The acting stinks. The plot is retarded and I mean just what is the point? I like Bruce Campbell and Sean Astin and know both of them have done some cheesy work, but I would have to be paid a lot of money to save my shame and embarrassment on this one. It's one thing if a movie is meant to be cheesy, but for some reason, I get the impression that this one was meant to be taken seriously. Yeah, I'd show off my snowboarding skills if I were being chased by someone intent on killing me...I mean I am that good. Of course the thug chasing Sean Astin was doing helicopters too, as if they were choreagraphed by someone in junior high school...

What a waste. I pity the fool who thinks this was a worthy work.

The plot in Icebreaker is such a mess that it doesn't merit much discussion. A group of terrorists descend on a Vermont ski resort looking for a downed plane carrying a nuclear device. In the end, however, the nuclear device is all but an afterthought as the head baddie sets his sights on the lesser goal of blowing up a ski gondola with one person on board. Ski patrol member Matt is on the case to stop the terrorists and save his fiancé (who is quite naturally the person on the gondola).

How in the name of all that is Holy did the makers of Icebreakers get a cast that includes Sean Astin, Stacy Keach, and Bruce Campbell? Were these guys that hard-up for work? Do they enjoy skiing so much that a free weekend on the slopes of Killington was enough to entice them? Did the producers have compromising photos? I just don't get it. Astin may be a good actor, but he's not my image of an action hero. When I think of Arnold Schwarzenegger, Chuck Norris, and Rob Van Dam - Sean Astin is not the next name that comes to mind. Stacy Keach phones in his performance from the State line. It's obvious he has no interest in Icebreakers. As for Campbell, as much as I love him, not even he can save this thing. Bruce's charm, so evident in the Evil Dead Series or Brisco County or even Burn Notice, is not here. Like Keach, he doesn't look overly interested in the project.

But the acting's not the problem - it's the muddled plot. I watched the whole thing and still have no idea what was motivating the terrorists. They want the nuclear device simply because that's what a terrorist would do. The take-over of the ski resort seemed so unnecessary. Their plan had not gone so off-track that they still couldn't have secretly gotten their weapon and disappeared. Why bring so much attention to their activities? The answer - it's in the script. The whole thing this is a complete mess. Character motivation in Icebreakers makes absolutely no sense.

I'll give Icebreakers a generous 3/10.

This film is made by the same guy who made the infamous film, Time Chasers which was a great episode of MST3K. It is nice to see he continued to make films and to see that he has significantly improved since his time traveling film. I think he also did a large spider film that also was much better than Time Chasers. That being said, it is still pretty much a bad film, but it was a rather fun bad movie to watch as the film that is being copied in this one is Die Hard and maybe through in a dash of Cliffhanger.

The story has two dudes flying a plane with some sort of stuff on it that is radioactive. For some reason, the pilot decides to auger the plane down into the countryside; however, the other person who likes mango jam is still alive, that is until bald Bruce Campbell kills him! Soon, he and his super group of terrorist take over a ski lodge while Sean Astin finds the package the guy wants and he somehow has to save the day by not doing a very good job. Then again, the FBI guys do an even more terrible job trying to stop the terrorist and Sean is just a guy who finds people on the mountain and they are actual cops.

The film could have been better with more action, but the action scenes with the exception of the last one are short lived. Something you would expect from a movie that probably does not have a very big budget. Then again, who would expect them to be able to procure the talents of Sean Astin, Bruce Campbell and Stacy Keach? They are not just cameo roles either, they are all in this film a significant amount of time.

So, not that great, but still an entertaining film nonetheless. Still not sure what Bruce Campbell's ultimate goal was or if he was really as close to death as they made him out to be or if it was really his birthday. Also, not sure how they got power back on as they blew up one power station, sawed through wires and ripped wires out of a pole. I mean, a tree falls on the lines where I am and the crap can be out for seven or eight hours!

A plane crashes near the Killington ski resort. On board is a container with a radioactivity warning--in the Cyrillic alphabet.

A group of terrorists, led by Sandra and the terminally ill Greig, are willing to kill, and they do. The power goes out at the resort, and contact is lost with the outside world, except for incoming calls to the resort.

Meg wants to marry ski patrol member Matt, who cleans banks during the off-season. Her rich father Bill does not approve. Through creative and humorous editing, as Meg explains Matt's good qualities, we get to see whether he actually has them. Matt is dealing with some of the terrorists, along with forest ranger Beck, who provides comic relief.

Oh, if only the entire movie had the quality of the music with the opening credits, repeated in the final scenes before the closing credits. Beethoven's Ninth Symphony (the part that included the familiar 'Ode to Joy') performed by the Tblisi Symphony Orchestra. The credits didn't list the name of the excellent tenor soloist (I think he was a tenor, anyway). Magnificent.

I liked Bruce Campbell better as the comical hero Brisco County. He has his moments here as a smart-aleck villain, but I wouldn't say he could make a career out of playing a bad guy.

I felt sorry for Stacy Keach, who apparently was going through a career slump. He did show how talented he is, and if you blink you'll miss it.

Resort manager Clay came across as an incompetent idiot, and later as a poor excuse for a human being. I'm not sure this was a good thing. Beck was a more likable loser, and better acted too.

There were some interesting chase scenes, including one with a great stunt snowboarder. And plenty of explosions for those not obsessed with them. Also lots of tension toward the end. Early in the movie when the terrorists were in New York City, there was a great overhead shot of what may have been the Empire State Building.

But overall, there was nothing really special here.

Terrorists take over a ski resort in search of some "plutonium stolen from the Russians" that went down in the woods. Sean Astin, looking just as he did in "The Goonies", scampers earnestly around the mountain as a member of the Ski Patrol, spending most of his actual time running away from the machine gun-wielding intruders as they blindly shoot at him. His biggest concern is not the radioactive material which could incinerate the entire mountain, but the fact that he is late to a lunch date with his fiancee and her father, played by Stacy Keach. Chrome dome Bruce Campbell is the haughty leader of the terrorists, dying from some unspecified disease. Nice scenery, and a fairly exciting chase scene on skis, snowboards, and snowmobile, but what's the point?