Bodigâdo Kiba

Bad dubbing and a weird added bit make the dubbed version pretty bad, but not having seen the original, it's unfair to use that as a base for the movie. Not nearly Chiba's best in any respect.

Now I'm more of a Bruce Lee fan than a Sonny Chiba, but I always admired his films. The Street Fighters series is awesome, but this is one of his films I'm half in half on. Don't get me wrong it had it's moments, but it was just too fast for it's own good.

Sonny plays himself and offers himself to be a bodyguard to anyone who knows about the flood of illegal drugs. And this is where the film goes nowhere into endless action and cheap yet gruesome deaths.

If you are a die hard Chiba fan than get this, if not then my friend you are sadly in for a sour treat. A treat into weird camera angles of violence and stupid dialog that comes great for Chiba, but lame for others.

For masochists. 1976's The Bodyguard is a grade Z Karate opera that gives proof that the martial arts craze of 30 years ago was just that, crazy. Unless you like to watch film stock wasted, don't buy this incompetent junk. I got it at Wally World and thought it would be a hoot. It wasn't.

What makes this stuff so mindbogglingly, stupefyingly, crushingheadachingly bad isn't that it's all of those adjectives and so much more. It's because there are folks who just can't get enough of this Kungfoolishness.

Hell, there are people in this country who collect Precious Moments figurines, too, so I guess we're all even.

I just finished watching this film and WOW was that bad. Actually the only thing that kept me watching was that it was SO MONUMENTALLY bad it was kind of entertaining. The action of the characters is hilarious, from the hyper-dramatic way they fall to gunfire, to their incredibly bad acting (were the bad guys all just pulled off the street, or were they actually actors?), to incredibly bad delivery of lines, to their inexplicable actions (if you are going to try and shoot someone through a doorway as they enter, obviously the thing to do is shoot directly at the doorknob!!). This film must break some record for worst written and delivered lines.

The camera work was also really bad - you can hardly see what's going on in the fight scenes due to switching camera angles and shakiness.

I would have voted "1" except that I do like Chiba and sidekick Sue Shihomi, and I was entertained by a couple of scenes: 1) breaking of a villain's arm so the bone pops out of the skin (that's gotta hurt) 2) a drug kingpin eating a brown-furred animal (a monkey??) by hacking away at the carcass with a meat cleaver 3) Sonny Chiba's performing some impromptu eye surgery on a guy with his fingers.

I am actually a big fan of Sonny Chiba but this one is really not worth anyone's time. I've seen about 7 or 8 of his films and have come to the conclusion that the only ones worth watching (and they are great!) are the Street Fighter series, and The Killing Machine. I've also heard the Executioner and Golgo 13 are good. I recommend sticking to those ones.

Even if you are a die-hard Sonny Chiba fan there is no reason to see this snooze-fest. However, watch the first five minutes for a tacked-on bit shot at a Times Square dojo in the mid-'70's that has absolutely nothing to do with the rest of the film. That sequence is so badly-acted and ludicrous that you'll wet yourself laughing! The sequence goes something like this:

CAMERA PANS UP STAIRCASE, GOES INTO DOJO.

An Hispanic martial arts guy does a pointless routine with two pair of nunchaku ("chucks") and comments to an Italian-looking karate guy "That's how Bruce Lee woulda done it!" The Italian guy says "That's pretty good, but here's how Sonny Chiba woulda done it!" He then proceeds to approximate some of Chiba's trademark moves from THE STREET FIGHTER on some poor student. After leaving the poor student hanging by his nuts, the two martial artists rub their chins and muse "I wonder what Sonny Chiba's doing now?" Then the movie lurches to a start. You may now turn off your vcr and do something useful like eat your own earwax.