Cold Hearts

Typically I wouldn't bother doing a review of film like this that wasn't really anything special, nor was it a horrible film you just want to forget either. Full disclaimer, this is definitely a B-movie in every regard, low budget, marginal effects, acting just passable, and an ok, but unoriginal story. "Cold Hearts" in no way compares to the better films of the genre, like "Lost Boys" & "Near Dark", among others.

However, all of that said, there is something about it, just different enough, just interesting enough to make it a decent watch if you like these types of films. This will be shocking to those that hated it, but I've actually watched it three times; all the way through!,,,,lol. Admittedly for me, part of my appreciation for the film is this odd fascination with the lead, Marisa Ryan, not the most beautiful or talented actress in the world, but she has something uniquely appealing about her. The story, though somewhat predictable, was worth staying with til the end also, and I found the ending satisfactory.

Finally, I gave this movie 7 stars because for a low budget film of this genre, and if you like this genre, it can be a fun watch on a weeknight or weekend day when you have nothing better to do. Personally, I found it a decent watch for a low budget film of this genre, but some others who find they may like it, may consider it one of those "so bad that it's good" type films, & I can understand that feeling!

Very indie, and very low-budget, this also very much reflects that it is the first effort of filmmaker Robert A. Masciantonio as either writer or director. I'd be lying if I said this weren't painfully rough from the very start. Wide swaths of the dialogue and scene writing come off like something Masciantonio put together when he was at most a freshman in high school, and never developed further (including wholly unnecessary homophobia); his direction is achingly bare-faced, without any tact or feeling. The only cast members I'm familiar with are Amy Jo Johnson and Christian Campbell, but I know what they're capable of, and I trust the same is true of their costars - which can only mean that the amateurish, inchoate acting (alternatively dull or overzealous, but never on point) is the result of weak material and direction. The editing is similarly gawky, as rudimentary as it could get, and the music is awkwardly basic, or sometimes excruciatingly On The Nose. None of this is to say that 'Cold hearts' is intrinsically without value; I've seen other movies of a similar nature that were actually quite good. The fact remains, however, that this feature overflows with abject inelegance that unquestionably limits its entertainment value.

The plot is flummoxing for how light it is, the tale of a small group of vampire friends hounded by a larger and more predatory clique, with particular focus on one among the former. It's not a bad concept, but for lack of especial eventfulness, or any major plot points treated with suitable vibrancy for us to latch onto, the audience is left to flit between successive scenes which, as stated, are less than stellar on paper and in execution. Even those scenes that should carry emphatic weight struggle to achieve the desired impact, and a couple moments of intended gravity (characters revealing back story) simply feel so empty that one's engagement falters. There are also poor connective threads between scenes and story beats, such that the inclusion of some instances feel detached and contrived. One wonders how much of the budget was devoted to securing the licensing fees for the handful of popular songs that appear in the soundtrack (e.g. Chris Cornell, Denis Leary, a few others), and to the effects. Any post-production additions are less than perfect, though at least definitely not the worst I've seen; gratifyingly, the special makeup and effects employed, especially those at the end of the second act, perhaps got the most mindful attention of anything in these ninety minutes.

Suffice to say that 'Cold hearts' is sadly a very, very mixed bag. I don't think it's entirely awful, and for my part I was able to derive a measure of enjoyment from it. Yet this is, far more than not, so limp and anemic in every regard - owing mostly to Masciantonio's inexperienced writing and direction - that it's difficult to say it's specifically recommendable, except perhaps to utmost fans of someone involved. Even the climax and ending are astoundingly flailing, being poorly written, shot, and acted. I don't hate it, but I have difficulty saying the very words "I like it." Save it for a lazy day when you're extra bored or curious.

Indie filmmaker, Robert A. Masciantonio engaging emo-vampire feature is appealingly set within a lively New Jersey seaside suburb, where the garish lure of sandy beaches and noisome amusement parks attracts a constant flow of transient, thrill-seeking tourists, and the handsome predatory vampire master, Charles (Christopher Wiehl) hungrily haunts this briny locale with his subservient, but no less malign entourage of plasma lusting, voluminously-panted goons!

'Cold Hearts' is an earnest, romantically-inclined Gen-X drama wherein benign vampire besties, Viktoria, Alicia (Marisa Ryan) (Amy Joe Johnson) and their fiesty gay chum, Darius (Jon Huertas) endeavour to cope with the ceaseless existential malaise of living, fitfully loving, and reluctantly feeding as angsty, navel-gazing vampires. Their precarious existence constantly threatened by the violent oppression of malevolent master vampire, Charles's arbitrarily murderous peccadilloes. When tough cookie, Vicki fatefully falls for studly hero, Seth (Robert Floyd) the simmering internecine tensions erupt climactically in a bestial beach front beatdown! While the preponderance of heartfelt 'chat' may alienate gorehounds, less bloodthirsty viewers may still appreciate that the seemingly forgotten 'Cold Hearts' remains an entertaining, strongly acted, dramatically full-bloodied romp that sweetly suggests some vampires are not quite so cold hearted as the legends would have us believe! The soundtrack rocks, with an especially poignant use of Temple of The Dog's evocative 'Say Hello 2 Heaven'.

This low-budget indie film about grungy, vampire youths haunting the beachfront (sound familiar?) could have been smart and amusing, but instead comes off like a fanged version of some WB-style TV show. It misses some clever opportunities to be both stylishly violent and sexy, and instead relies on long conversations between a brooding female vampire (who consistently delivers monotonous sad stories to everyone she meets), and a frat boy with a dufus persona and a dubious moral code. Technically competent but utterly adolescent.

Viktoria (Marisa Ryan) and Alicia (Amy Jo Johnson) are 'good' vampires and together with Darius (John Huertas) are close friends living in a coastal American city. When the newcomer Seth (Robert Floyd) arrives, he has a crush on Viktoria. Charles (Christopher Wiehl), a 'bad' vampire, does not like the proximity of Seth and Viktoria, and decides to disturb Seth with his gang. A great surprise waits for Charles in the end of the plot.

"Cold Heart" is a unoriginal story that blends Near Dark', with 'Lost Boys', plus 'Angel' and 'Buffy'. The result is not totally bad, but in the end, it is just a forgettable vampire movie. There is a scene, supposed to be funny, in the middle of the credits, when two guards find the remains full of blood of the two dead vampires. Why these vampires were not converted into dust? Further, why Viktoria was able to walk in the sun, only with minors burns? My vote is five.

Title (Brazil): 'Filhos das Trevas' ('Sons of the Darkness')

Note: On 11 December 2021, I saw this film again.