Cosmos: Situación limite

Despite the fact that they were produced during the same year , "War of the Planets" had nothing whatever in common with "Star Wars". While the former was definitely an "A-Picture", "War of the Planets" is strictly "Grade-Z". The story is nearly incomprehensible, the writing terrible, the acting wooden and the production values about what one would expect in a high-school play. Some cheesy science-fiction films can be so bad that they are entertaining. however, this example of the genre is simply...bad. About all this film accomplishes is to make the viewer appreciate just how good things like "Star Wars", "Star Trek" and "2001: A Space Odyssey" actually were.

Yup .. this piece of cinematic doodie, is terrible. Why, Oh why, do I have soft spot for crap movies .. we'll never know. At least I'm not the only one. Apparently this is a kind of follow on from "Planet of the Vampires" .. which although low budget, was quite an entertaining and atmospheric film. It's definitely NOT a Star Wars rip off as it has nothing to do with that.

It starts badly, teeters off in the middle, and the less said about the end the better. Best thing to do if you want to see this is with it on youtube .. there's a few places that have it. I certainly wouldn't buy it unless it's on one of those sci-fi movie box sets that contains 100 awful movies.

I won't dwell on the 'story' .. but needless to say it's badly made. Awful script ... if awful even comes close to describing it. One can't help but blame the director for a lot of the dumb performances because .. well .. it's his fault! Editing is okay, considering the crappy material they had to work with.

But hands down the biggest offence in this film is the music score. Ouch!! .. like being rogered with a prize winning cactus. John Barry proved you could have awesome music in a goody film (Starcrash 1978), so there's no excuse to phone in the score like they did here.

Watch it if you dare, or if you're a sucker for bad movie .. like me! This movie could have been saved if the boys and bots at MST3K had riffed it, sadly it wasn't awful enough for them :P

Would be a good film for a crap-fest!

I just finished watching this...and I will be honest...I'd seen a few minutes of it browsing a Digiview DVD compilation...I truly knew from just that few minutes this was probably a stinker, but I watched it because the actresses had tight uniforms. Yes, I know...that's terrible...but I couldn't help myself. Truly, the story was a wash out and watching the girls really was the motivation. I will say that actor, John Richardson was not as bad as everyone else. Too bad he didn't get a film role that he could shine. The ending of the movie is reminiscent of a twilight zone twist, which was a nice touch for those who suffer through it. Directing is almost as good as a high school film production, and a blind grandmother could have done much better cinematography. I read here that a reviewer wrote the special effects were as cruddy as 1950's sci-fi, and I say shame on you for saying that...they not nearly as good as Flash Gordon or War of the Worlds. On the other hand, they are as good as that stuff I just left in the toilet. But seriously, I can't even say that you have to see it to believe it, because in all fairness, you wouldn't believe it. Sadly, this film has been preserved electronically for all to see.

In 1977, Alfonso Breschia grabbed a video camera, some torches, some of his mates, and a moog and went to his garage to make a film of the future where multi-cultural crews battle space threats, technologically advanced robots are smart-arses, and Glaswegian astronauts turn into slime drooling monsters!

All of Alfonso Breschia's space films have a terrible reputation, and that's because they are terrible low budget affairs full of people spouting scientific bollocks while ear piercing noises and flashing images assault the senses. This one however actually manages to transcend all this to be entertaining and awful at the same time. Let's get to the plot and explain.

For starts, John Richardson is a hot-headed space captain who hates the fact that everyone relies on a computer called the Wiz to do the thinking for them. In fact, he's not a fan of that simulated sex machine Malisa Longo uses either. He'd rather let his balls and his brain do the thinking, so when Earth receives a signal from outer space, either his brains or his balls act quickly and attack two aggressive ships that fly towards his ship. This turns out to be a good idea.

On this mysterious planet, the crew find an archway that teleports them...somewhere else where they are attacked by a violent indestructible robot who has been murdering the silver-coated alien inhabitants. We find out that there's this huge arrogant computer that ended up in control of everything, likes killing things for fun, and wants to take over Earth. That sounds like a job for robot hating John!

In this crazy world were people have to awkwardly wave their hands behind their heads to close doors instead of using door handles, alarms flash like 90's raves and scream insanely, and astronauts sing 'I belong to Glasgow', how does one distinguish who is human and who has been taken over by an alien computer? Strangely, this film turns into a horror at the last twenty minutes, which is probably why I rate this one over Breschia's other sci-fi trash crap.

Weirdly, this film uses the 'blast the alien out of the airlock' bit before Alien! You're a trailblazer, Breschia!

So I concur with most of the reviews that suggest "War of the Planets" is an abomination, and if it weren't for the figure-hugging uniforms (as worn by the female cast), ludicrous skull-caps, a vaguely entertaining climax and a now-rare appearance by one-time international star John Richardson, this Italian sci-fi wouldn't rate at all.

Something of a "2001: A Space Odyssey" rip-off, that also seems to be channeling "Beneath the Planet of the Apes", finds rogue skipper Richardson assigned a supposedly benign mission as penance for his misbehaviour, suddenly thrust into a fatal mission to protect the earth from an omnipotent intergalactic robot that has decimated the inhabitants of a nearby planet.

There's an awful lot of cheesy special effects, unimaginative set decoration, random solar flames and ubiquitous laserblasts, underscored by the typically puerile over-dubbing, and punctuated by Strauss and other stock music of the ilk, serving as some misguided attempt at a sophisticated backdrop. It's actually very tame and very lame with little redeeming qualities. Richardson looks assured despite the tripe, and he's ably assisted by the intense-looking cast of relative unknowns (Yanti Somer, West Buchanan, Vassili Karis and Percy Hogan in a minor supporting role) as they plod through 90 minutes too long of futuristic bunkum.

Too derivative to capture a cult following, just another C-grade snore- fest that's found its way into unsuspecting loungerooms via the 1-cent movie bundles - which is not to suggest every film in those boxes of goodness are as laborious as "War of the Planets", but this is definitely one of the few to avoid.