Vice Academy Part 2

About 15 minutes into "Vice Academy Part 2" I thought the words 'dumb' and 'clumsy' would be accurate enough to describe this comedy. At the end of the movie, though, there was only one thing left to say about it... Utterly moronic. So yes, things go from bad to worse in "Vice Academy Part 2". Arguably, the only two reasons to see this film are Linnea Quigley and Ginger Lynn Allen. They're both good-looking blondes who can't act (something they're very well aware of themselves), and since I have no particular interest in these two ladies I can safely say this whole sorry excuse of a film was completely lost on me. But since I was familiar with Linnea's history as a scream queen in horror movies and Ginger (an ex-pornstar?) apparently has fans of her own, I decided to take a risk and give the dubious "Vice Academy Part 2" a watch. So well, I brought this onto myself.

There's virtually no plot to speak of. Some female criminal called Spanish Fly is out to destroy the population of L.A. and she's aiming to do this by polluting the city's water supply with an aphrodisiac. She starts by poisoning the L.A. police department first. Holly (Ginger) & Didi (Linnea) are on the verge of getting fired, but end up getting the assignment of stopping Spanish Fly. Since there's only two main sets in this movie - the police office building and a night club - you can expect not much to happen during the next 90 minutes. And whenever nothing's happening (which is most of the time), the scenes are rigged together with lame sex-jokes.

As if writer/director Rick Sloane had one sudden moment of pure genius inspiration, all of the sudden he throws Bimbo Cop into the story. An incredibly cheesy cyborg-cop - who just looks like a female wrestler with a complementary silly outfit - who's supposed to save the day and arrest Spanish Fly at the night club, which is also the perfect setting of course for Ginger & Linnea to perform a striptease act. So yes, the two leading ladies bare their breasts eventually. Obviously, it's meant to be the movie's highlight and it pretty much is.

"Vice Academy Part 2" is the equivalent of the Troma company trying to make a straight-up (sexy) comedy. It's very hard to fathom that their were in fact 6 movies made in this "Vice Academy" franchise. It must be a real torment to sit through them all. At least for me, I imagine it to be. I've had more than enough of my share already with this one.

Good news is this one is just as good as the first one. Bad news is the first one wasn't good. Holly Wells (Ginger Lynn Allen) and Didi (Linnea Quigley) have graduated and are now vice cops. Problem is they must work as a team or will get the job of going undercover as a prison inmate.This time around the villain is Spanish Fly (Marina Benvenga) and she plans to taint the water supply for the city of L.A.

Has the same title song as the original, which ain't a bad song, but you'd think writer/director Rick Sloane could get a different song. Same actors playing in different roles. Looks like they might have had fun making these movies, but it is almost like torture to sit through.

"Vice Academy 2" is worth sitting through only for Ginger Lynn Allen: she is cute, she appears in black lingerie, she wears a revealing dress, she performs (along with Linnea Quigley) a strip dance, and she throws one mean right punch. Other than her, the film is so PAINFULLY drawn-out, so insultingly lame, so persistently witless that you simply won't believe it (just one example: what a brilliant idea to create a powerful half-woman/half-robot crime-fighter and then put a switch on its back that anyone can easily move to "worthless" or "overload" mode). If complete lack of talent was a crime, writer-director Rick Sloane would be serving a life sentence. My rating is pretty generous for this one. (*1/2)

Like all B movies sequels are unavoidable, but fortunately for once it's an enjoyable sequel. Linnea and Ginger Lynn return to bust more bad guys and stop the evil doers the only way they know how, with their bras, guns, and brains (to bad they can't rely on the latter for much help). The film is missing the spark of the original with loss of characters like Chucky Long and Cherry Pop, but does have some laughs, and it is a good way to kill 80 minutes. Look for B movie queen Melissa Moore in the pre-credit sequence.

The original Vice Academy was a staple of my late night movie watching as a kid thanks to USA Up All Night, but I never got around to see this sequel until last night. It's a perfectly acceptable and occasionally fun sequel with Linnea Quigley and Ginger Lynn Allen still giving it their all and camping it up as Didi and Holly - two new police recruits who don't seem to know how to do anything. They have to keep proving their worth by tracking down and apprehending perps that the regular police force can't, which was, more of less, the same concept as the original film, except this time they've graduated and are a part of the force.

As expected, there's a good deal of T 'n A, but it never comes across as sleazy as it should, because the film mostly focuses on the comedy aspects. It's light, silly, and absolutely ridiculous, but the filmmakers and cast keep things lively and it's very entertaining if you don't forget to turn off your brain and go along for the ride.