Phoenix the Warrior

You are the last man on Earth and lots of scantily clads babes rule the wasteland. Wow, this is my type of story line and if its your to then this will be a winner.

This movie was a mainstay of USA Networks former weekend show UP ALL NIGHT. Simply put this is great late night cheese well worth checking out. I have seen the video box (Boris cover art I believe) at several video stores, so no excuses.

P.S. Watch for the well endowed axe wielding babe in the prison fight. Super!

Recipe: a dozen scantily-dressed strippers out in the desert with guns and a few dune buggies. Build sets from found items. Sketch out a hack script, then let the girls improvise actual dialog. Add one desperate-for-the-big-time actress who once had a good part in a big-budget movie. Roll 'em!

This appears to be the sad result of someone taking money for production, spending it elsewhere, and then quickly filming this over a weekend so they wouldn't have to return what they'd spent. There are worse films; the images are in focus, dialog is audible, and the uncredited soundtrack improves as the film goes on. But there isn't anything to see here that isn't done better elsewhere -- namely, AMAZONS from the year before (1986), which had actual sets (left over from Deathstalker) and a lead actress who had actual weapons training. See that instead, and skip this.

"She-Wolves of the Wasteland" belongs to the "post-nuclear war" movies wave that followed "Mad Max". Provided with a typical 80s disco keyboard soundtrack, its most unusual element is the cast which comprises almost entirely of females. Did I hear anyone complain? No! One tribe lead by the mutant "Reverend Mother" and the warrioress Cobalt (Persis Khambatta from "Star Trek" and "Megaforce") tries to find the (possibly) last male on earth, but he is on the run with Phoenix (gorgeous: Kathleen Kinmont)... What do we get from this movie? Quite a lot of fun, for example there is a mutant tribe whose gospel includes the holy words "Sesamy Street" from a mysterious distant past, and obviously with all the babes around: exploitation with a capital S. These girls are so violent, when they run out of ammo, they pick up swords to cut throats - or even tear each other's hair! Yes, it's silly, but compared to other flicks of the genre that have too many gladiator fights and car races, it's one of the better trash movies around and worth checking out!

With a forumla like that, how could you go wrong? A lot of ways. This is one of the most amazingly bad Mad Max rip-offs I've ever seen. There's a moment where the kid is given a music box and he just tosses it away, an obvious nod to 'The Road Warrior', but then literally tossed away. Also can't forget the 'Thunderdome' inspired "arena" which is just some sticks and barbed wire.

When you've seen one Mad Max inspired movie, you've seen them all, but this one adds a feminist touch... and it touches all the wrong places. It wouldn't be so bad if the writers working on the script actually took the time to think about what they were writing and why.

The plot is simple, all men are dead, women inherited the Earth.

The reverend mother has somehow developed magic powers that are never fully explained and only serve as a plot device to further the story when it's most convenient. Seriously, she apparently has telepathy, but is unable to find the child until she's given a toy he was playing with (a toy car that has somehow survived all this time). Seems kind of odd because she could sense when he was born and knew where he was. Hmm, strange. Most of the plot is like this, nothing is explained, there's no real exposition and you're left asking "why" and "how" to everything you see. If not for the year it came out, I'd almost swear they were doing a rip-off of 'Waterworld' because it suffers from many of the same issues... but Waterworld was at least entertaining and fun.

It is nice to see that women in this barely post apocalyptic world be able to keep their manicures nice, their hair perfectly permed and skin flawless. There also seems to be no shortage on gas, bullets, water and modern clothing, mostly consisting of spandex and aerobics workout outfits and a pair of Levi's. It makes it hard to really understand just how far in the future this should be (the plot itself is over a period of six years as it is).

This movie truly suffers with how boring it is. Even the grotesque amount of scantily clad babes wielding guns and swords (none of which I have any issue with), you're just waiting for the movie to be over with. The acting is atrocious. I'm almost certain everyone was just reading queue cards off screen that were written in crayon. The only one that seemed to have any kind of experience acting was Persis Khambatta, but even she isn't enough to balance so much wooden acting that you could build a fence. Though, I will give them credit, the dialogue was probably written by pre-teen girls who thought this was what the future would be like.

Fight scenes are laughable with how fake they are, never actually landing a hit or attempting to make it look like their punches and kicks have any kind of power behind them. There's even a scene in the arena where they don't even hide the fact that the opponent has fallen onto a soft mat, they literally leave it in the shot! Gun fights are ok... if you like watching swimsuit models pretend to know how to wield a firearm. I've seen women shoot guns before and they do it very well when properly trained, but this is just embarrassing to watch.

If you're a fan of T&A movies or Mad Max style movies, you'll mostly be disappointed, but it's still fun to watch and see what bad movies like there were inspired by.

After a biological war has annihilated all the males on earth and most of the females, those few women who survive are left to fend for themselves in an effort to stay alive. Many of them soon gravitate to a particular evil sorceress known as "the Reverend Mother" (Sheila Howard) who mysteriously manages to impregnate some of the women but ensures that no males are born. Until, that is, one specific woman named "Keela" (Peggy Sands) becomes pregnant with a "male seed". Realizing that the Reverend Mother is determined to kill her unborn child, Keela attempts to escape from her domination. During the attempt she encounters a "sand trapper" named "Phoenix" (Kathleen Kinmont) who provides protection and support both before and after the child is born. Now, obviously with a title like "She Wolves of the Wasteland" a person probably shouldn't expect too much. And they would be fully justified in feeling wary as this film consists of bad acting, cheap sets and corny dialogue. It does, however, have an abundance of bimbos in skimpy attire which may be a good thing or a bad thing depending on your particular mindset. I personally didn't mind the acting of Kathleen Kinmont or Persis Khambatta (as "Cobalt") or the skimpy attire on any of the young ladies. However, skimpy attire or not I could only take so much of the bad acting and awful combat scenes. But that's just me. In short, this movie might be good with a friend or two and lots of beer. Otherwise, it might be best to let this one go by. Below average.