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Its hard to believe that anyone could actually like this nonsense movie. The music is just run-of-the-mill rock, the acting is bad, the humor is mostly lame. About the only good things that I can say for this production are that the pace is reasonable, and there is enough gore to keep a splatter movie fan happy. That's about it. I rated it a "3 of 10".

Greetings And Salutations, and welcome to my review of Hard Rock Zombies; here's the breakdown of my ratings:

Story: 0.75 Direction: 0.75 Pace: 0.50 Acting: 1.00 Enjoyment: 1.00

TOTAL: 4.00 out of 10.00.

I really wanted to like Hard Rock Zombies. I mean, zombies, rock music, neo-nazis, cannibal mutant dwarfs, a town that's anti-Rock'n'Roll, and Adolf Hitler, what more could a music-orientated comedy horror require? Well, for a start, a good story, gut-busting comedy, perfectly timed direction, head-banging tunes, and decent acting. Sadly, the audience receives very little in the way of these.

Krishna Shah, who also directed, and David Allan Ball, tells us the story of an up-and-coming rock band. The Hard Rock Zombies are trying to hit the big time and are playing small towns throughout America. Unfortunately for them, their next stop hates rock and roll. The council and townsfolk do everything to prevent the show from going on, even arresting the Zombies. Luckily, they get bailed by a well-to-do family in the area. But something isn't quite right about them. And when the band gives them a free thankyou performance, they're electrocuted. Is the house's electrical system old and dangerous, or are there other powers at play? There's one thing though: The old mansion contains an undeniable power. As the group's leader riffs off a new track, he realises the tune can resurrect the dead - real-life Hard Rock Zombies. Wow, the story's packed with everything but the kitchen sink, and the possibilities the plotlines provide are endless. So why doesn't it work? The simple answer is lack of skill. The story needed better structuring to ease its jaggedness and enliven the dullness. There's a fair amount of good in the script. Sadly, neither Shah nor Ball makes the most of it. The worst parts are the comedic elements. From their many attempts to make you chortle, only one scene works, and even that is an only juster. It's the skit where the council vote to ban Rock'N'Roll from their town. And though it's humourous, it's when the last resident steps up to the podium to make their statement that I began to titter. Luanne. "Rock n' roll music causes... Sex! Adolescent sex! Premarital sex! And, worst of all... Physical Sex!" And the way the actress delivers her argument is the icing on the cake. She's all excited smiles and subdued, sultry sexiness. This segment works because of the actor's and actresses' performances. What the narrative required were better structuring and better character development. Apart from the odd scene, most characters are dull as dish-water.

One element that could've lifted the sluggishness was the direction. Sad to say, Shah's directional skills are as exciting as his writing. You have an actual band, and though the guys aren't outstanding actors, they're not terrible musicians - though the songs leave a lot to be desired. If he'd filmed these guys correctly, he could've forgotten about the other stuff a little. But he doesn't, and there's nothing better than the concert segments to display Shah's failing. He loves his pick-a-spot, set up the camera, point, shoot, and record style. This form could've worked had the band been more dynamic on stage. Sadly, they're of the stand-by-your-microphones brigade. But it's not all bad because Shah incorporates a few varied camera angles. Though they're interesting, he holds the shot too long, adding to the picture's sluggish feel. And don't get me started on the Hard Rock Zombie's Zombie Stroll. Shah attempts to make this parade stylish and engaging for the viewer. However, it comes across as poor as a third-rate rock video. Had they employed a top-notch rock video director, the movie may have reached the heady heights of hard rock heaven. Or, at the very least, been a contender in the cult movie charts.

I always find it tough to drop the blame for an awful movie in the lap of the actors and actresses. The performers can only work with the story and characters they're given and can merely deliver the scenes in the way the director directs. On the whole, everybody gives a decent performance, except for the band members. I found these guys to be too subdued, over-eager, as hammy as a pig on a butcher's slab, or as wooden as a pirate's peg leg. And they get worse when you take the lines away from them. When they go quiet and zombified, it's horrific and not horrifying or amusing as it should be.

All in all, Hard Rock Zombies is not the movie it could've been, and because of that sad fact, I can't recommend it to anyone. There are many better horror comedies to enjoy. I suggest you find one; you could try looking in my Absolute Horror or Just For Laughs lists.

Okay, while I slip the latest rock LP onto the turntable so we can get physical with our freaky selves, you can take a look at my IMDb lists - Absolute Horror and Just For Laughs to see where I ranked Hard Rock Zombies - or to find something more entertaining for your visual joy.

Take Care & Stay Well.

This movie is AWFUL, don't believe otherwise! The acting is absolutely terrible, the plot is nonexsistent, and even the makeup is cheap. Yet all of this adds up to a hilariously bad zombie movie! The humor itself isn't funny at all, yet it's amusing because you're laughing AT it, not with it. I really enjoyed it, although it had no redeeming qualities at all! Basically it is one of the worst movies ever made, and for that reason it's pretty funny.

Anyone going into this movie looking for a blood curdling shocker is barking up the wrong tree here. The title of the movie should tell you that. On the other hand, if you want to feel the tears run down your cheeks from incredulous laughter and your throat get sore with the groaning at the awful sight that's facing you, then maybe you will be able to suffer it.

Rock star wannabes who maybe should have found out what music is first, a dwarf Nazi zombie, a re-incarnated Adolf Hitler, a few dim bimbos, terrible audio and visual and you have everything you could possibly want!

Great lines, including a girl picking up her boyfriend's head and asking if he's OK are priceless. I take my hat off to the scriptwriter for having the front to write this stuff down.

Anyway people, it's one you have to take as you find and enjoy for the rubbish that it is. It is bad horror at it's finest.

Ten years ago, I would have instantly and blindly considered this to be a great film purely based on the title and awesome DVD-cover. In the meanwhile, however, I struggled myself through enough bad movies to know what a film like "Hard Rock Zombies" really stand for: multiple overlong interludes in which horrible songs are played from start to finish, a non-existent storyline build around an untalented band and of course a complete absence of atmosphere, tension or black comedy. The horrible rock band (that is so not HARD-rock they're playing) of which I can't even remember the name arrives in a little town that disapproves of music. Yes, this is somewhat of a horror parody on "Footloose" only not that funny or memorable. Instead of a puritan reverend, the band members in this town are up against demented characters like a werewolf grandmother in a wheelchair, evil midgets and the reincarnation of Adolf Hitler himself. The band losers get killed but return from the death even stupider looking than before and take their revenge. Even if you can get past the shameless Nazi propaganda footage and the totally random "Psycho" imitations, "Hard Rock Zombies" is still a dreadfully dumb and boring movie! There's an endless amount of padding, not only through lame music but also through dialog sequences that are purposelessly stretched. There's a gore, but of the lamest kind and the jokes aren't even funny when you're drunk or stoned. There's a scene, for example, in which one brainiac states: "Ghouls don't like head, so they'll let us escape". What? Next thing you see is literally people walking past the ghouls whilst holding pictures of giant heads. There's no way I can be intoxicated enough for humor like this. I do reward this retarded film with one whole point extra for the self-devouring midget. That was quite cool.

I was given this film on DVD as a present by a friend. Giving this movie a 1 on a scale of 1 to 10 is not fair. Negative numbers should be possible.

Granted, its so terrible that its slightly funny (like when and old woman turns out to be Hitler in disguise), for the most part this movie was simply terrible.

You have to suffer through an entire sequence of these Bon Jovi looking idiots dancing around to music that is more like really bad disco/elevator music. I like 80's cheese metal. There was none in this movie.

It is the single least convincing zombie movie ever made. The production values and special effects of this movie amounted to effects that you can make yourself (even if you are mentally retarded and can only use your feet). The zombies simply look like people with flour dashed on them and lots of mascara.

Most real bad movies at least have something that passes for a plot. Not this one. It was just several scenes put together with more "zombies" (people with flour sprinkled on them) at the end than that at the beginning.

I dunno. Maybe I should have been high when I watched this. I just felt like an hour of my life was wasted on something that was so terrible you could not even laugh at it. It was like watching a car accident, but a car accident at least has really good special effects.

The CIA ought to use this movie to interrogate terrorists.

Ah, eighties music. When it was good, it was good; and when it was forgettable, it lives on only in artifacts such as this movie. Rock and roll zombies, midget Nazi rednecks, a grandma who turns into a werewolf, a nearly mute young girl with Groucho Marx's eyebrows, and Adolph Hitler himself—how can you go wrong with a lineup like that? Very easily! All in all, a bland movie. You can obviously see how the filmmakers were trying to keep themselves interested, with limited results: The Hitler scene (I honestly thought the movie would get better after that); Hitchhiker Girl's repeated interpretive dance sequences; even the deformed dwarf slowly eating his entire body (in the last scene, he's nothing but a head -- and then he sucks his face into his mouth and chews, leaving only a skull). Despite all that, you could almost hear the director yawning. Or maybe that was me.

I had the pleasure of viewing yet another odd addition to the zombie horror genre: Hard Rock Zombies. Our movie starts out with some blond chick hitch-hiking on the highway who then gets picked up by 2 guys in a sports car, goes skinny dipping with them, and then kills them both while a man accompanied by 2 weird midgets (one of which is deformed) photographs the entire event. Then we are introduced to the main characters of our flick, a rock band, led by Jessie who is the bass player and lead singer. They're jamming at a gig and then head into a back room after the show to have some fun with the groupies. While in the back room, a strange girl named Cassie warns Jessie not to play their next gig in this town called Grand Guignol. When he asks for an explanation she doesn't give him one and leaves Jessie hanging. Problem is, they can't skip the next town because a big shot talent scout is going to be there to watch the show.

So they go to Grand Guignol anyways even though they've been warned. On the way, Jessie is fumbling around with an ancient incantation he found while playing it over a rock bass line. They show up in the town, which is composed of stereotypical local yokel folks, and dance around. Yes, that's right - dance around. See, Hard Rock Zombies is also a musical and whenever the movie takes you into a musical number it's shot like a music video. This is pretty hilarious since the music is standard cheese ball 80's stuff and the antics in the video are lame at best. Still, I'm laughing.

Well, wouldn't you know, the same blond chick from the opening scene lives there and offers to put the band up in her mansion vice the local hotel. They accept since every one of the members wants to nail her except for Jessie who is falling for the odd Cassie girl. Unbeknownest to our heroes, Adolph Hitler, Eva Braun (who is also a werewolf), and the photographer with his 2 weird midgets also live in the mansion. The town is also not happy that they've arrived and quickly pass a measure to ban all rock and roll music at a town meeting. Jessie finds out that his incantation is effective for bringing the dead back to life after fooling around with it in his room. He then records it with his bass line and tells Cassie to play the tape at their graves should something tragic happen to him and the band.

Sure enough, Adolph and his buddies kill the entire band in various ways including one scene that's an obvious tribute to Hitchcock's "Psycho". The heart broken Cassie laments at Jessie's grave and then plays the tape. Voila! Our heroes emerge from the grave, looking paler, and proceed to walk and dance around the town like robots. Yes, that's right, LIKE ROBOTS. The standard groaning, lumbering slowly, and arms straight out zombie gait does not apply here. Oh yeah, and this is set to another cool song with the accompanying music video. Groovy!

Our heroes take revenge on their antagonizers and then play their gig to an audience of one: the talent scout. Another music video accompanies this bit and it's a sentimental ballad dedicated to Cassie. Things get crazier from there. More people come back from the dead and the deformed midget sits at the dinner table and decides to eat HIMSELF. The town residents go into a panic and devise humorous ways to defeat the zombies. Finally one person convinces the rest that they need a virgin to be ravished by the zombies at midnight on a full moon so that the zombies will slumber for 100 years. Guess who the virgin is?

I won't give away the ending but the deformed midget does succeed in eating himself and Hitler's gas chamber makes an appearance. Hard Rock Zombies has gotten crap reviews on almost every site that I looked at. Well, I think that what these people were missing was that Hard Rock Zombies is not a movie to be taken seriously. This is strictly campy fun and I got quite a few laughs from it. Hard Rock Zombies succeeds as a horror based comedy, not by design, but only by serendipity.

If Orson Welles only had the talent he would have made Hard Rock Zombies, but he didn't. So these guys did. "Ghouls hate heads..." The plot of this movie is incomprehensible. The execution of the script is amateurish. It's quite possibly the stupidest movie of all time. And if you haven't seen it you're not alive. Get yourself some Milk Duds, some Schlitz, and HRZ, Troll 2, The Pit and have a grooviest bad movies of all time-athon. Umm, the music sounds OK, too, when you're really drunk. It's really kind of hard to say ten lines about Hard Rock Zombies. I just wanted to say it rocked I didn't want to be here all night trying to think of things to say about it.

Hey, even though I'm only a supporting player in this debacle, (I played the intellectual) I am utterly flattered by all the positive comments. You get it. Maybe I can go to horror film conventions and have a crappy table in the corner somewhere signing autographs for $5 when I'm in my seventies... For the rest of you: I hope you find some joy in your lives-SOMEWHERE!! We were out to have fun and we did. BTW-I watched close-up and first hand much of the second unit photography and the effects were AWESOME!! John Carl Buechler was the guy doing all that stuff and he was also the second unit director and steadicam operator. If you don't believe he was up to the task of making the effects better than they are in this film, check out his credits on IMDb. While I was on set, news arrived that the film lab had accidentally destroyed most of the second unit's film. Bittersweet-lost forever to the dozens who would witness the film, insurance payoff meant that the film had already turned a profit...

It's a normal b-movie with sad rockers "rocking" until Hitler comes into the movie. Then it just gets screwy. This is type of movie that makes the Trancers movies and Surf Nazis Must Die look good. Yet, it's still better than Godzilla 2000 and "Manos" The Hands of Fate.

You can guess it is not a movie to watch with high expectations, but there should be at least something for the actual fans of the genre i.e. extremely low budget zombie movies, rock'n'roll and the 80s as such. Sadly, there isn't. Technically speaking this production it is not even a movie, but a remade 20-minute piece and you can notice the desperation of the filmmakers trying to fill the other 78 minutes with anything at all, which included full songs played by the band on stage, totally random interludes and repeating the same video sequences. The unrelated scenes could disturb the plot and the logical course of events, if there were any, but in fact there wasn't much.

This movie is quite different from other zombie movies, surely it is gory and tasteless at moments, but for the most part it is incredibly boring and the things which make no sense are not even that funny. It can be quite a disappointment for hard rock and heavy metal fans (who are most likely to pick this movie: come on, zombies, Hitler and rock'n'roll) because it doesn't really feature the 80s' music they would listen to. The tracks are not hard rock and not even rock'n'roll. I liked the love ballad "Cassie's Song" though. I think I'll even give the movie an extra star for that (the base rating was 2 for "bad, but I managed to watch it till the end").

I find this movie a little too bad even for people specifically interested in bad movies. Unless things like Nazi zombie midgets really do it for you, then you totally should go for it.

Now, of course not everything with zombies in it is a sure-win guaranteed entertaining movie. And as I had the opportunity in 2022 to sit down and watch the 1985 horror comedy "Hard Rock Zombies" for the first time, I must admit that I wasn't really harboring much of any hopes or expectations. I hadn't heard anything about the movie prior to watching, well aside from being familiar with the movie by its title alone.

So writers Krishna Shah and David Allen Ball had every opportunity to surprise and entertain me with this 1985 movie. But I must admit that "Hard Rock Zombies" fell very short of being a movie that had much of any appeal with me, and thus I didn't find much of any enjoyment in it, nor any particular entertainment.

The storyline was pretty far out there, to the point where it was just downright goofy and cringeworthy to witness. And the ludicrous characters and their dialogue just didn't really work for me. I am sure that it was fitting for the mood of the movie, but I just didn't enjoy it.

I was only familiar with Phil Fondacaro on the cast list, and he wasn't even among the lead performers. Normally I do enjoy watching new and unfamiliar faces and talents on the screen when I watch a movie, but it didn't really apply to "Hard Rock Zombies" for some reason.

For a horror comedy then "Hard Rock Zombies" was a swing and a miss. There are far better horror comedies from the mid-1980s with much more entertainment value than this movie from director Krishna Shah. The comedy in the movie fell entirely short of finding a home with me, and as for the horror aspects of "Hard Rock Zombies", well, don't get your hopes up.

My rating of "Hard Rock Zombies" lands on a two out of ten stars.

Back in 1985 the zombie film THE RETURN OF THE LIVING DEAD mixed comedy/zombies/horror/gore together beautifully. This other 1985 film does the opposite and pretty much falls flat on its face.

A rockin' band named...I forget and it really doesn't matter...is making waves and is ready for its next concert in a hick town. The lead singer/sometimes bass player Jessie (E.J. Curcio) who looks like Dean from FUBAR is warned to not go to their next gig by a girl named Cassie (Jennifer Coe). The warning seems to fall on def ears, though. The concert is canceled and the band is thrown in jail. No matter Jessie wrote his latest hot hit while in the slammer called 'Cassie'. The band in turn is killed, but they are able to return as zombies because of a book Jessie got a hold of that taught him how to bring the dead back to life. Anyways, you are also hit with a werewolf granny in a wheelchair and a zombie Adolf Hitler.

Poorly written and constructed. Bad lighting leaves you guessing as to what is on the screen when it turns to night. The music is okay, but some songs are overplayed and the movie just stops so you can watch another middle of the road song. John Carl Buechler did the make up for the zombies. Also starring Phil Fondacaro.

Travelling to the redneck town of Grand Guignol, where they hope to impress a music mogul with their next show, a heavy rock band pick up a beautiful hitch-hiker who invites them to stay at her home, which she shares with her bizarre family. Once in town, the band runs into trouble with the authorities, and lead singer Jessie falls in love with local girl Cassie, but the band's outrageous rock 'n' roll antics and Jessie's blossoming romance are short lived: the musicians are murdered one-by-one by their strange hosts, who turn out to be a bunch of bloodthirsty ghouls led by none other than Adolf Hitler!

Following the band's funeral, a distraught Cassie plays Jessie's last recording—music inspired by an ancient magical book that has the power to raise the dead—which results in the pasty faced foursome clawing their way from their graves to seek revenge, and to play one last gig.

When I first saw Hard Rock Zombies, on its original video release over 20 years ago, I thought it was absolutely awful; these days, I find the film slightly more bearable thanks to its nostalgia factor (gotta love all that big hair rock!) and my unhealthy love of cheesy 80s crap. However, I still struggle to understand what the hell its makers were thinking of: were they intentionally aiming for cult status with this insane mix of rock and horror, or is the film a genuinely inept, asinine piece of trash made by a bunch of totally talentless fools? The jury is still out on that one...

The film starts off promisingly, quickly scoring points for gratuitous use of both nudity and dwarfs, but rapidly becomes a jaw-droppingly bad mish-mash of musical interludes and inept gore (courtesy of FX man John Carl Buechler), interspersed with moments of complete inanity: the dwarfs watch on as an old man (later to be revealed as Hitler) shtups his wife; the old lady turns into a werewolf; the hitch-hiker dances to herself for no reason in the desert; one dwarf eats himself; the band survive an electrocution while practising; and one guy momentarily avoids being eaten by pretending to be a zombie (beating Shaun Of The Dead to the joke by a couple of decades).

It's all utter garbage, of course, but somehow strangely compelling.

If you want to see the worst of the worst this is your movie. It contains the most horrific, pathetic, story line of all time. The main plot is basically a so called "rock star" in his late 20's who falls in love with this 13 year old...very weird. The songs are actually kind of fun in the movie. I guess the guy who wrote the music for this movie help the band "Journey" create music. The best part in the movie is when they come to the town and they show that montage of how their making the town exciting. I just wish that I could see some of these actors today. I just would like to go up to one of the main characters and be like, "Hey...so um, how do you feel about your life after you made Hard Rock Zombies?".

I recently watched Hard Rock Zombies (1984) on Shudder. The storyline follows a rock band that stops in the wrong town, plagued by curses, Nazis, and midgets. A young lady in town falls in love with the singer, but unfortunately, the band is killed. She uses a curse to bring the band back to life to try and save the town.

Directed by Krishna Shah (American Drive-In), Hard Rock Zombies stars E. J. Curse (Late Last Night), Ted Wells (Saint Nick), Phil Fondacaro (Willow), Richard Vidan (Terminator 2), and David O'Hara (Biohazard).

This is one of those movies where you keep asking yourself, "What did I just see?" as you watch it unfold. The costumes, settings, and soundtrack all work for the premise. The makeup for the zombies looks like I could have done it, and there are some bad montages. However, there's also a werewolf with two switchblades, Nazi midgets that eat cows, elements of puppet masters, and a great ending. The props are hit or miss and had me cracking up throughout; there's a scene where Arthur has the worst "branch" prop I've ever seen. Despite this, the ending is worth the journey, making it one of those "so bad it's good" films.

In conclusion, Hard Rock Zombies is an absolute mess with enough worthwhile elements to make it enjoyable. I would score this a 6/10 and recommend seeing it once.

I have seen some horrible movies in my life, this film, if it can even be called that, is the most worthless film I have ever suffered through. I would like to meet the writer(s) of this film just for if no other reason to ask what the hell they were thinking. How is Hitler still alive? How could music on it's own makes zombies. I feel stupid saying this but in Weekend At Bernie's II it sort of made sense. I was also wondering if anyone else noticed that the lead singer in his twenties was making passes at a if barely teenage girl? In summation the movie is improbable and utterly disgusting. I warn all potential viewers to spare themselves the impending lobotomy.

This is truly a great movie, if you are a fan such as I. this is one of the horror movies that will disappoint if you are looking to be scared or for a quality film, however, it is perfect if you are looking for a lame-horror comedy. I suggest any fans of such genre pick up this movie and watch it religiously.

I recently watched Hard Rock Zombies (1984) on Shudder. The storyline follows a rock band that stops in the wrong town, plagued by curses, Nazis, and little people. A young lady in town falls in love with the singer, but unfortunately, the band is killed. She uses a curse to bring the band back to life to try and save the town.

Directed by Krishna Shah (American Drive-In), Hard Rock Zombies stars E. J. Curse (Late Last Night), Ted Wells (Saint Nick), Phil Fondacaro (Willow), Richard Vidan (Terminator 2), and David O'Hara (Biohazard).

This is one of those movies where you keep asking yourself, "What did I just see?" as you watch it unfold. The costumes, settings, and soundtrack all work for the premise. The makeup for the zombies looks like I could have done it, and there are some bad montages. However, there's also a werewolf with two switchblades, Nazi little people that eat cows, elements of puppet masters, and a great ending. The props are hit or miss and had me cracking up throughout; there's a scene where Arthur has the worst "branch" prop I've ever seen. Despite this, the ending is worth the journey, making it one of those "so bad it's good" films.

In conclusion, Hard Rock Zombies is an absolute mess with enough worthwhile elements to make it enjoyable. I would score this a 6/10 and recommend seeing it once.

I have to comment, because this is one is a real waste of time. I collect old horror, and i paid $3 for this gem, that $3 could have went towards a shoe-horn and it would have been better spent. Unfortunately, i really wanted to like this movie, it has a great cover, a great title, and the director has a really cool name. Well, that's the only good praise i can give this one. The movie itself is torture of the worst kind. The "hard rock" is actually just horribly irritating mainstream 80s cheese hair tunes. The zombies are nothing more than the lead characters with white face paint! I mean they could have at least painted their arms and maybe their hands, but no. Also, the "zombies" walk like robots. The plot is basically just a cop-out to sell the love story, which is the lamest love story i have ever had to endure on screen. But i think the highlight, no check that, the "lowlight" of this garbage is that the unintentional humor is forced, and the back of the case boasts that this is an "outlandish thriller that melds the rock beat and stunning visuals of THRILLER with the campy horror/comedy of such cult classics as THE ROCKY HORROR PICTURE SHOW and BLOODSUCKING FREAKS. When the makers go as far as to advertise the "camp" factor it's usually a good sign to avoid. As for fellow gorehounds, there is nothing to see here, no gore whatsoever, there are killings but they are all off screen. There is blood, but no splatter. There is a midget, i will give you that, but even his cute little soul couldn't help this trash. If you want to see a similar but far superior movie see BLOOD SUCKERS FROM OUTER SPACE. It has far better comedy, much more silly gore, and works with the same budget. 2/10.

This film has it all! A pedophile romance, a switchblade wielding werewolf granny in a wheelchair, Hitler, zombie midgets, awesomely cheesy 80's tunes, nudity, and some of the worst acting and editing i've ever seen. This is one of those rare movies that's so bad it's good. It's offensive, bizarre, and just flat out hilarious (unintentionally, of course). If any of the aforementioned story elements intrigue you or if you're just into really low-budget 80's horror movies...then this might be worth checking out. Would make an awesome double feature with "rock and roll nightmare". The love ballad "Cassie" should be the theme song for all pedophiles.