Teaserama

Well, at least Teaserama has Betty Page and the spectacularly-chested Tempest Storm to lure the viewer into a false sense of security. Once you get past these two, however, the film degenerates into dull gyrations from a variety of forgettable women, as well as painfully unfunny comedy routines. I assume they're supposed to be comedy; they could be just random words, it's hard to tell.

If you're a fan of Betty Page, Tempest Storm, or just kitschy camp silly costumed burlesque then you might as well watch it. If you want something erotic, or exciting, then don't watch it..

To think that this type of content was considered Rated X a few decades ago ...

But I can see the elegance and fun it goes through, a different but cool experience.

This is horribly dated piffle. It doesn't have a plot and it's completely tedious. The wonderful Betty Page is wasted in one of the worst movies of all time.

This film is bad even by 1955's standards. Sexy, it isn't. Even by the lowest rent version of Burlesque, it is a mess. The "Top Banana" has the unfortunate problem of not being funny. Not even with the "take my wife, please" joke. Production values are non-existent. With one exception, the women are...well, you judge for yourself. As for the stripping? You will see more skin on a Cape Cod beach in January than is displayed here.

There is nothing wrong with being tacky. But this is just incredibly boring. One dance goes on for seven minutes and is not one-hundredth as sexy as Rita Hayworth's dance in "Gilda".

The one glimmer of light in the entire film is 1950's icon Bettie Page. Bettie has two dance numbers. Neither of which are very good. She also introduces each act with it's own title card. It is here that she shines. There is a freshness, a sexy naughty girl-next-door quality that she lends to these all to brief moments.

If you are a BIG Bettie Page fan and have a fast forward button then rent this. Otherwise, for your own safety, stay a way from this film at all costs.

To think that this type of content was considered Rated X a few decades ago...

But I can see the elegance and fun it goes through, a different but cool experience.