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Never have I been so uncomfortable so long a period of time. Normally movies have a scene that shifts into the distressing/uncomfortable and you're like "wow, what a great scene."

That's the whole movie. Except for about 3 light moments scattered throughout the subject matter of conversion therapy and the environment our protagonist Jared is literally TRAPPED in is awful. The homophobia and control that the Love In Action conversion program enforces over the poor souls inducted into this brainwashing camp becomes increasingly extreme. The way it causes distress and breaks people is shown differently through the various side characters and none of it is good. This is a tragic story of the real abuse of LGBT people happening in the US (and gay conversion therapy isn't explicitly banned everywhere in Aus either).

I was on the edge of my seat, deeply breathing, sighing, putting my hands to my face in awe and distress, the whole way through. Just when I thought this movie couldn't get more uncomfortable it finds a new height.

It achieves all this through plot and intimate performances. Everything else is so stripped back and naturalistic. There's barely any music, or at least not very noticeable background music (with the exception of the song Revelation by Troye Sivan/Jonsi, which will likely vie for a nomination for best original song). It looks like they almost didn't have a lighting crew for more of the film, instead relying on house lighting for a dark, moody, or contrasting aesthetic. The whole thing feels not like a stylistic piece of cinema, but a realistic look at a person's life. Which is the point given it is inspired by the real experiences of someone who suffered through the abuse of conversion therapy. This film is so well put together.

I never want to watch it again. Which is weird for a film I love so much. But this movie is harrowing. It haunts me. I don't get very emotional over film but this subject and execution was just so deeply uncomfortable for such a long period of time that I don't feel the need to ever subject myself to that again. Which is a great recommendation if you want something to make you feel sad/distressed for nearly 2 hours straight.

I enjoy horror films. I have watched hundreds of them, everything from the classic 1930s Universal titles like Dracula and Frankenstein, to some of the more modern high-tech efforts. In general they don't scare me. This film does. The amount of ignorance and cruelty portrayed in this film should warrant it an X rating. The truth is, I wasn't even sure at the beginning whether it was for or against its subject matter. You'd think in the 21st century that there would be more members of The Flat Earth Society than people who truly believe you can "pray away the gay." Obviously I'm wrong. In fact, the VP candidate of a major party is a strong advocate for that belief. So I'm not sure what this film really is. Is it a documentary? Is it a melodrama? Is it just a flat-out horror film? Whatever it is, it put me squarely in touch with the amount of ignorance and cruelty that exist in my fellow humans. We criticize other cultures who practice female genital mutilation, yet we - decent Christian folks - do this? If I go see a film about some shape-shifting mutant who eats human brains for dessert, I wouldn't be particularly troubled by it (other than the graphic FX). At the least, I know that there were no shape-shifting mutants in the theatre audience with me. I wish I I had the same confidence about who sat in the theatre with me watching this film on any given night. Folks like this are out there, and the unspeakable pain they subject others to in the name of their religious beliefs is truly frightening. This is a good film, competently cast and acted, and well written and directed. I hope it finds the audience it deserves. I hope it alleviates some pain and suffering somewhere, which is an odd mission for a horror film.

The son of an Arkansas preacher goes to gay conversion therapy, first willingly, then reluctantly. Therapy includes religious (casting out demons), pop-psychoanalytical (family tree, family anger), and behavioral (learning stereotypical male mannerisms). While demanding truth, the conversion leader insists that what his subjects claim to have experienced is insufficient to be truthful.

I have seen movies on this theme before, the most recent being The Miseducation of Cameron Post. However, this hews closely to an autobiography, and at the Toronto International Film Festival, the actual mother and son showed up at the Q+A.

Lucas Hedges and director Joel Edgerton are wonderful as the main protagonists - the son and the therapy leader. Nicole Kidman only plays a supporting role as the mother, still a role bigger than Russell Crowe as the loving but misguided father. This is very much an advocacy film against gay conversion, and has the star power to get to a general audience.

This adaptation takes a lot of liberties with the story from the book, which is certainly common enough and can lead to a more entertaining film. However, in this case, the seminars seemed facile and facilitators were caricatures, almost laughable rather than menacing. It's much more clear in the book that the point of conversion therapy is to crush participants' self-esteem and replace it with a slavish adherence to fundamentalist ideology. It is brainwashing, intended to destroy independence of mind. The "therapy" is truly scary and I don't think this was captured well in the film.

The other aspect of the book that is mostly missing from the movie is Garrard Conley's interior dialogue. The plot of the book is actually pretty thin; Garrard's self reflections and his insightful portrayals of the other participants make his book far more moving than the film.

And finally, the film ends with Jared's confrontation with his father. The movie makes it seem like the cowed teen is finally standing up to his tormentor, the author of his tragedy. In the book, I never perceived that Garrard ever views his father with anything other than love and respect, as a person of sincere and deeply held views. His book is dedicated to his parents. You wouldn't know that from the final scene in the film.

It is scary what we do to ourselves and our families. This is a dramatization of a real life horror. Well written, well acted and well directed.