Affairs of State

Irrelevant actors and actresses in this couldn't make this feeble script come to life...surprise, surprise. I'll occasionally pick an obscure title with a no-name cast to watch when no other decent titles are out. And sometimes some of them are half-way watchable. But this title had me rolling my eyes five minutes in.

So I experimented and started muting the sound and turned on sound bites from various stand-up routines. It made this fractionally more bearable as I was able to at least chortle through parts and get my mind off of how godawful this thing was to sit through. Without the sound, those poor actors in this looked a little detached like they weren't overly compelled by the material. Talk about a time waster...

Let me save you 97 minutes of your life that you can't get back. The writing is derivative, trite, and predictable. The performances lacked any sort of cohesiveness. The directing felt uneven and the pacing absurdly sluggish. The music didn't help the story at all, in fact it was downright annoying at times. The shots were clumsy and to be honest it wouldn't surprise me if this was made on some sort of smart phone or similar. Unfortunately I can't say anything redemptive about this or I'd be lying.

Thriller? NOPE! Boring? YEP! Compelling writing? NOPE! Horribly directed? YEP! (although even a competent director couldn't have save this POS). Good performances? NOPE! Wishing I never saw a 70 year old actress trying to have sex? YEP! Waste of ninety minutes and endless brain cells? DOUBLE YEP!

Rating this 1 star out of 10. Couldn't even finish the film, it was that bad. The picture quality and sound gave it an amateurish feel. Looks like it was shot super low budget. Skip this one.

Whoa, no wonder every single reviewer is trashing this thing. It's difficult to fathom how this drastically flawed script ever got greenlit by any producer. They must be imbeciles. This was so poorly written and produced that I can only guess that the writer and/or director were in some way related to the geniuses throwing money into this. Maybe it was a blackmail situation. Or maybe worse than that. Adding insult to injury, the "acting," if you can call it that, was embarrassingly amateurish. This lame-ass effort isn't even worthy of a b film classification. File this one away under "Nobody except twelve people will bother to watch this."