badmelody

This film is funny. Make no mistake about that. It's a gem of a comedy which provokes out-loud laughter in abundance. A whole host of comic characters are at hand to deliver some unforgettable lines amid a very simple, ungarnished plot.

Passing her driving test qualifies nurse Joanna Jones (Juliet Mills) for a position as a district nurse. So she, together with her dotty mother, moves into an out-of-the-way village to take up her new duties. After twenty-odd years under the care of an elderly district nurse, the villagers are somewhat distrustful of the young and beautiful Nurse Jones. This leads to some hilarious situations as the new district nurse is thrown amongst the village's inhabitants. Abel Worthy (brilliantly played by the irascible Noel Purcell) is felled by a tin of corned beef - just one in a series of delightful mishaps. And the dialogue is even funnier. `You know Dr Golfrey's secretary? That flighty young thing? Well, she's flown.'

Esma Cannon relishes the role of Joanna's eccentric mother and Norman Rossington plays a blinder as George Judd, the lovelorn hob-jobber but Juliet Mills is nothing short of outstanding in the lead role.

All in all, Nurse On Wheels is a wonderful example of English comedy. It may be a cliché but they don't make 'em like this anymore.

This film makes for a very confusing ninety minutes - so confusing, in fact, that the perpetrator has to explain the denouement by means of a voiceover right at the very end.

The plot itself is very simple. Someone is apparently titillating women via a telephone chatline, meeting them face to face and then brutally murdering them. Overhearing these conversations by way of a faulty telephone handset, a young woman (Brooke Langton) comes to the conclusion that the murderer is someone living in her own apartment block. So to help the story simmer away nicely we are given a few ingredients to play with - a reclusive boyfriend, a lesbian lover, an aggressive co-resident and a weird caretaker, along with a couple of dark and languid sex scenes. It's true that the plot has a few twists but amidst the bemusement, they neither help nor hinder.

One of the problems of this film is that the two lead characters are so physically alike that it's difficult to tell which is which - only the shape of their mouths offers a clue. Both are nevertheless competent and credible actresses. However, it's the feeble storyline and not the acting that lets this film down. Ultimately, it's an erotic thriller without the eroticism and the thrills.

Julie And The Cadillacs is a less than average musical with a tortured plot and some cringeworthy acting. The fact that Toyah Willcox is in it gives some idea of the film's quality for it is the same Toyah Willcox who can't sing, act or even speak properly; and wasn't she in that awful Quadrophenia? Anyway, despite the many negatives of the film, Julie And The Cadillacs has a certain sardonic something which will keep the viewer's eyes on the screen. Spotted by a slimey PR man in a Liverpool club, Julie Carr (the blond and almost beautiful Tina Russell) and her backing band The Cadillacs travel down to London to cut a record. They meet various characters during their big-time adventure, all of whom burst into song at some point, usually when least expected. And most of those songs seem to have been written in under ten minutes by a five year old. The exception is a number called Saw A Boy which is unnervingly quite decent and this is just as well because the song is performed three times during the film. The trials and tribulations of the band's attempt to grab stardom is really quite boring and the story twists and turns like a perfectly straight line. Julie And The Cadillacs is a film that you really must see but one that you really must never see more than once.