ronc-5

There is a certain type of movie. It's usually a made-for-TV movie, and it's usually an "updated" remake of an older movie.

The cast and story elements are painfully politically correct.

The writers appear to labor under the mistaken assumption that the viewer really doesn't need to be told a coherent story as long as there are a few visual elements from the original and some handsome-looking people emoting at each other. And things blowing up.

If there was a punchline to the original, the film will either ignore, misinterpret, or completely blow it.

The remake of Lathe of Heaven (2002)was such a film.

The remake of The Andromeda Strain (2008) is also such a film. It takes the tight script and edge-of-seat stress and paranoia of the original and substitutes digital effects, things blowing up, and absolutely nonsensical plot. When the time comes for the big reveal (which I won't reveal here), instead of the insightful political message of the original, we get a sophomoric, pasted-on ending that doesn't relate to what's gone before and basically contains no message whatsoever, but does allow one last digital effect.

It's not even bad enough to be good in a campy way. It's just dreary and indecipherable. See the original instead.

Someone asked me once what I thought of Zooey Deschanel. I said that I thought she was very pretty but I've never seen her in anything good.

Last night we saw the pilot episode of New Girl.

So now…

I still haven't seen Zooey Deschanel in anything good.

Oh, I know she had a part in Bridge to Terabithia, which was just OK, but she more than made up for that in the crushing disappointment that was Tin Man.

But it's not necessarily their fault when an actor appears in something that stinks, so high ho, let's pour a glass of wine and watch the pilot of New Girl.

It was horrible. It wasn't even "let's get used to our parts, we'll be a little uncertain at first but it'll get better over time". It was just horrible. It's the kind of zany, over-the-top chewing-the-scenery "humor" that's one excruciating embarrassment after another. It's like a 6th grade class was handed a big budget and a bunch of actors and told to create a sitcom. I tried watching it with the sound off because Zooey really is pretty, but it didn't help. I don't expect the show to last a season.

Let's face it; the Discworld novels are rather uneven. The first three are barely worth bothering with. But then, Pratchett produced a novel, Mort, that was dangerously close to literature. Mort went on to be a stage play, and Pratchett went on to write other things. It took four years to get back to the Mort storyline with Reaper Man in 1991, and another three years to continue the story in Soul Music in 1994.

Having read all the Discworld books so far, I still think Soul Music is my favorite. Having played in a band myself, I could appreciate the musical in-jokes better than most. Imagine my surprise when a friend mentions casually that Soul Music was an animated feature and he had the DVD. A trade was arranged (one of my Bubblegum Crisis volumes) and I settled down to watch my favorite Discworld novel transformed into a movie.

So how was it? Oh, pretty good as a whole. After a stunning CGI opening which takes us on a quick tour of the Discworld, the film settles down to conventional animation with an occasional computer assist. My friend describes the animation as "kinda like squigglevision" (as in Doctor Katz and a couple others) but I have to disagree -- it's much better than that. There are a few places where it was painfully obvious that the animation team was trying to save a few drawings by playing the same clip over and over, but in general, the animation was adequate.

The voice talents ranged from excellent to really really bad. Christopher Lee was excellent as Death, as was Debra Gillett as Susan, Death's Granddaughter. The voices of the band (Lias, Glod, and Buddy) were very good. Other voices were adequate, with the exception of the wizards at Unseen University. Yes, I know they were supposed to be petty old men, but why did they have to have the pitch, tonality and speech patterns of Smurfs? It became irritating after awhile. I found myself getting restless whenever the wizards were on the screen, wishing the scene would be over. It's a mystery how such bad choices could co-exist with such good choices.

Plotwise, most everything is there. The story was shortened in a few spots, which is reasonable when filming a novel. Sometimes the editing destroyed a joke; for instance, when Nobby and Sgt Colon comment "there she goes -- Susan Death" the joke falls flat for lack of the earlier setup. "Wasn't that death?" "I dunno, it looked more like a Susan." I believe from the description in the book that Pratchett intended the sound of the shop fading and reappearing to be the Dr. Who Tardis sound, but maybe they couldn't get permission to use that.

Much of the humor of the novel manages to make it into the film, and it's still funny. I laughed out loud a few times, more out of surprise that a favorite joke was delivered well.

All in all, the film has a few flaws but is definitely worth watching. I've just learned that Wyrd Sisters has also been filmed. I can't wait.

Now if only they would film Hogfather...