Mercenaries

What a load of steaming manure. There is a basic quality to the plot, some of the acting is OK, the rest is horrific. You know you are in trouble when Kristina Loken puts in a performance significantly better than any one else. The fight choreography has some, er, nope, it ranges from average to poor, with most of the fault lying in the hands of the chimp that directed this and his ham fisted editor. I have seen worse premises for films, but whoever thought that taking the concept of The Expendables for women, adding the premise from Snake Pliskin, and handing over 1/10th of the budget really must have owed someone a soul to get this pile of tripe made. I love cheesy bad action films, it is a weakness for me, and I will forgive most things. But holy cow this film is just bad on too many levels and never makes fun of itself, it is trying to be good, and failing on every possible level. Bad directing of mostly bad actors, no finance, no continuity, not pacing, no rhythm, no originality (except new lows) nothing to redeem it. Watch Expendables and Escape from New York in stead. If you like the actresses watch Death Proof and Blood Rayne. Still not good movies, but a lot better than this.

"We're not nice women. We're not going on some fun adventure. We're going to do some very bad things to some very bad people." Ulrika (Nielsen) has just taken the President's daughter captive and is demanding for the US to recognize her as a Head of State or she will kill the daughter. The government has only one option, they must send in a team of mercenaries to rescue her. A team of women is picked and the mayhem begins. There isn't really a whole lot to say about this movie. This is an Expendables with women. That really tells you all you need to know. The dialog is cheesy and the acting isn't that good. The action sequences are OK but generic...like I said another version of Expendables. The movie was entertaining enough and I did stay with it and wasn't too bored but that's about all I have to say. Overall, a female version of The Expendables with roughly the same acting, dialog and plot. I give this a C+.

Man, online sit at home critics are just dogging on this film. Guys, keep in mind it's a low budgeter. People in general don't understand all the work that goes into making a film not processed by Hollywood big wig studios. Sure there was some lackluster acting and a few playing it straight forward. I've been on set of some low budget films. I have to say this one was decent. I only got bored in the beginning during the typical intro of each character. That has been done over so many times. (Vin Diesel - XXX) none the less, when the action gets rolling, it's not so terrible. I noticed people trashing the fight sequences. I can't speak for any others but I thought Zoe Bell looked great pulling them off as a harsh judge of screen action who came from a martial arts background myself.

I have to say that Nicole Bilderback is underrated and underused in this film. She is an actual kick-boxer who never once gets to showcase any of her real skills. She actually stills every scene she is in though it seems the only curse word she knows is "bitch". Lol. Asylum has come a long way from the mock busters they were known for back in the day. I think this film was a good cheesy action ride. Give it a chance.

I could rant about things like the uninspired washed out actresses and bad FX but even with a good cast and better FX it would stay an horrible movie. Made and sold on being an "Expendables" with women but not even close and probably done for 1/25th of an Expendables movie's budget. It's a mock buster with absolutely no plot (the little there is, is taken from Escape from New York), no reason nor sense. The team actions and decisions have no logic. It's an action movie without action and it's it worst crime. It's not even funny-bad, there is long stretches of boring and useless scenes for padding between boring talks (TALKS !!!) where nothing happen. save 90 MN of your lives and please watch something else. It's bad even by The Asylum sub-standards.

A group of female prisoners are assembled to infiltrate a people trafficking prison for a daring rescue.

For novelty cult value you can't beat this offering, shortly after watching The Expendables I made a wish list for a female version, and to Asylums credit both 80s stars Brigitte Nielsen and Cynthia Rothrock appear, sadly Grace Jones is not included, but there could always be a sequel (with Nielsen's return).

Nielsen puts in an entertaining evil performance and Vivica A. Fox battles through. Okay so the characters don't have second names, yes the stunt men extras act like they just stepped out of the A-Team, granted the effects and sets lack some lustre but there's some solid action pieces mostly involving Loken or Zoe Bell. On top of that you have a few humorous one liners, violence and gun play. It's B action cult gold.

Yes it's a pity it doesn't have a big budget look but what it lacks in production values it makes up for it with it's fun ensemble cast, take it with a pinch of salt and you'll have a blast.