- [the player has rescued Stan Lee]
- Deadpool: Him again? He's in this game more than I am! Who does he think he is?
- Captain America: Mom's apple pie! We got to save America from the Red Skull!
- The Hulk: HULK SMASH SKULL!
- [pants rip]
- The Hulk: Huh? Hulk rip pants.
- Captain America: That's why my red, white and blue is form-fitting yet flexible. I love American ingenuity.
- Nick Fury: Thanks for your help, Spider-Man. There's always a place in this operation for a hero like you.
- Spider-Man: Like I have time for that. I've got a trigonometry exam tomorrow, my aunt needs me to pick-up a dozen eggs, and I'm drowning in angst.
- J. Jonah Jameson: Doc Octopus? You're a real doctor, right? Cause I have a pain right here... down there... oh, and that bit over there, wow!
- Doctor Octopus: Your cheap health plan doesn't cover office visits.
- Magneto: You come to my lovely Asteroid M, but I don't get a house-warming gift?
- Thor: I say thee... NAY!
- Iron Man: Good luck magnetizing Thor's god-hammer. Oh, I've demagnetized my armor just for this occasion.
- Spider-Man: I took a bath. That's all I did.
- Iron Man: I hope Fury knows what he's doing. I tend not play well with people who've been attacking me and trying to steal all my stuff.
- Thor: If we were only children again, I would resolve this by giving Loki what you mortals call a 'wedgie'... But I fear the elevation of undergarments will save us now.
- Iron Man: Maybe not, but I'd pay good money to see that.
- J. Jonah Jameson: You understand the web, don't you?
- Peter Parker: The web? Yeah, it's a job and a hobby.
- Loki: Finally, my vengeance will be realized on your pathetic planet! I will harness the power of Galactus! He will have the earth for breakfast and Asgard for lunch!
- Spider-Man: Wow, he's gonna be pretty full. That's quite a lot of protein, even for a big guy.
- Invisible Woman: Ben, I believe some clobberin' is in order.
- The Thing: Aw, Sue... Ya ruined my line!
- Sandman: Alright! I let these big-wigs go, once you bring me some of those... Uh, Cosmic Bricks!
- Abomination: Why didn't they make me the supervisor here! That guy's got sand for brains!
- Iron Man: Don't tell me you got here on a really long spider line?
- Spider-Man: Uh, no. You're not the only one that can fly. Compliments of Mr. Nick Fury and S.H.I.E.L.D.
- Iron Man: You know, I could fit you with a rocket-propelled iron suit if you'd like.
- Spider-Man: Sounds... heavy.
- The Thing: I hope you ain't expectin' us to WALK to Latveria, Reed.
- Human Torch: Heh, you could use the exercise... Shed a few of those extra boulders...
- The Thing: I'll shed YOU in a minute!
- Captain America: Sir, Magneto desecrated the Statue of Liberty! What is that this country coming to?
- Agent Phil Coulson: Captain Rogers, I will personally oversee retrieving Lady Liberty and put her back together. You have my word.
- Nick Fury: If Magneto is involved in this thing, I'm betting he wants that nuclear core to make Asteroid M operational. Doom must be building some space-based weapon and he needs the transport. You ready, Captain?
- Captain America: Good to go, sir. So long as the Ever-Lovin' blue-eyed Thing here will lend a hand.
- The Thing: Sweet Aunt Petunia, I'll lend you both hands, Cap! It's clobberin'...
- Nick Fury: Not quite yet. Wait until you get there. Now, get to the flight line; Black Widow has arranged transport.
- Spider-Man: [after dodging Doom's blast] Hey! Spider-like agility at your service!
- Doctor Doom: You can't possibly defeat me alone.
- [Captain America, Thing, and Storm break in]
- The Thing: Who says he's alone?
- Iron Man: [arriving at Grand Central Station] Holding Grand Central hostage at rush hour? Now that's criminal!
- Galactus: [notices the giant Earth cake] Delicious cake!
- [Hulk bursts out of the cake, holding Thor]
- Galactus: Huh?
- The Hulk: HULK THOR SMASH!
- [he and Thor hit Galactus into the portal]
- Loki: This is only a temporary set-back! I, uh, planned for this! I will return!
- [Thor destroys the mind control craft with his hammer causing Loki to fall into the portal]
- Hawkeye: [walking through the bowels of Oscorp] You know, for a totally legitimate...
- Black Widow: ...and un-suspicious office tower, this place surprisingly disgusting.
- Spider-Man: You said it.
- Nick Fury: [to the heroes] Gentlemen, the situation is dire. I welcome any ideas.
- Mister Fantastic: You've got to be more flexible in your thinking, director.
- Iron Man: Maybe the bad guys can help? I guess technically that's a 'bad' idea.
- Mister Fantastic: Ironic. I mean, if Earth is gone, who do they have to menace with evil plots? Each other?
- [Fury calls Doctor Doom]
- Doctor Doom: Hello?
- Nick Fury: Doc, it's Nick Fury. I have a proposal for you and your friends.
- J. Jonah Jameson: [seeing Doctor Octopus] I need some footage of this for the website! How hard can it be? I mean, this time the news is coming to us!
- Spider-Man: [behind a desk; to himself] You could record it with your smartphone, J.J, if you could figure out how to turn it on.
- Magneto: [after the heroes arrive] You come to my lovely Asteroid M, but I don't get a house-warming gift?
- Thor: I say thee... Nay!
- Iron Man: Good luck magnetizing Thor's god-hammer. Oh, and I've demagnetized my armor just for this occasion.
- Spider-Man: I took a bath. That's all I did.
- The Hulk: [sighting the Statue of Liberty] HULK PUNCH BIG LADY!
- Mister Fantastic: Hulk, be careful! She's a national treasure! And her hat is really pointy!
- Iron Man: [after defeating Mandarin and Killian] So, like my suit?
- Captain America: I have a soft spot for the oldies.
- [the Hulkbuster explodes]
- Iron Man: Why is it my tower can never stay in one piece?
- Thor: [trapped inside the submarine] I cannot call down any lightning inside this vessel! We're trapped!
- [Jean emerges from the water in a telekinetic bubble]
- Jean Grey: Worry not, Thor, my telekinesis can separate water molecules.
- [expands the bubble to envelop Iron Man, Thor and Spider-Man, and lifts them out]
- Jean Grey: [after Magneto escapes] Magneto got away.
- Professor Xavier: That is most unfortunate. I think that means we'll owe Nick Fury a few favors.
- Mister Fantastic: [to Cap] Do you have much experience with theoretical quantum mechanics and exotic nano-derived power sources?
- Captain America: Um... I got a A-plus in American History?
- Human Torch: [meeting with Thor] Ooh, very theatrical with the lightning and everything!
- Captain America: He is the god of thunder. It's sort of his thing.
- Thor: I sensed the opening of the vortex because brother Loki used it as a pathway to Asgard.
- Wolverine: What the heck's he after?
- Thor: He is ever after only one thing... power. And also helmets with horns. He is really into those.
- Storm: [after saving Cap and Thing] Captain America, Thing... Charles Xavier sends his regards.
- Captain America: Storm!
- The Thing: Hey, a weather goddess ain't such a bad trade-up. 'Specially for Johnny.