Lockjaw: Rise of the Kulev Serpent

I'd give Lockjaw 1 star purely because IMDb will not allow me to rate it any lower. 1 star is being extremely generous. The whole film is terrible with wooden acting throughout, at times it's too painful for words. In addition you have to endure the lack of continuity that runs from beginning to end. As if the horrendous special effects don't make it unbelievable enough.

I would seriously not recommend this film if time is remotely precious to you. It's an hour you'll never get back and will leave you questioning why on earth it ever made it to DVD. It cost £7 here in the UK which is absolutely shocking. I like cheesy horror films that manage to be awful but good at the same time. This can't even claim to be that, it is just genuinely one of the most ridiculously dire films I have ever seen.

well nobody will ever read this review, but WOW worst movie ever! This film might be studied by archaeologists in the far distant future. It would serve humanity right for it even being possible to finance this "film."

The most vapid bunch of frat boys and their bowhead cohorts I have ever seen disgrace celluloid. You can feel the stupidity bubbling from the swamp it is set in up through the "actors" and right on up to (hopefully) the ruined careers of the director and producer.

The subplot involves a man whose wife is killed in a hit and run accident by the idiot cast. He finds them to exact revenge, but 10 minutes later one of the sorority girls is yelling at him because he is bumming her out by not being overly concerned about his wife's killers being bumped off one by one.

Everyone involved in this travesty really needs a giant snake to eat them to make sure they can never again waste the money that a film student with any talent at all could have used better

Film opens with the name CARNIVOROUS, tried to send IMDB a correction , but their form is beyond confusing and ridiculous. It's a good movie, story line for a B movie.

As a child, Alan Cade steals a wooden voodoo box containing a magical pen that has the power to make whatever is drawn with it become a reality; years later, when a monster truck accidentally runs down his wife Becky, Alan uses the pen to summon a monster to seek revenge on the occupants of the vehicle, five friends partying at a nearby cabin.

Lockjaw: Rise of the Kulev Serpent (AKA Carnivorous) is a derivative straight-to-DVD piece of garbage that rips off its basic revenge plot from enjoyable straight-to-video 80s horror Pumpkinhead. But where Pumpkinhead proved to be a fun creature-feature thanks to solid direction from FX legend Stan Winston, a very cool monster (also by Winston), and a decent performance from seasoned pro Lance Henrickson, Carnivorous simply elicits boredom and unintentional laughter in equal measures with its uninspired script, inexperienced cast, and truly crappy beast—an over-sized, poorly rendered CGI snake with an alligator's head.

Opening with an embarrassingly naff credits sequence, complete with cheesy lightning effects and statues with glowing red eyes, Carnivorous does not bode well from the outset, and matters only get worse from thereon in: director Amir Valinia sets up the film's back-story in an awful prologue that displays a complete lack of talent from its child actors (while also showcasing a neat array of dollar store Halloween props), before cutting to the present day, where he introduces viewers to his equally untalented adult cast, a bunch of total unknowns who are likely to remain that way if this is the kind of bilge they choose to appear in.

After some predictably dumb drunken shenanigans at the cabin, during which sexist jerk Kurt (Caleb Michaelson) gets a lap-dance from drunken big-breasted slapper Ashley (Victoria Vodar), Kurt's nice-girl girlfriend Sam (Lauren Fain) seeks comfort in the arms of good-guy Kelly (Wes Brown), and Ashley has sex with her boyfriend (but annoyingly keeps her bra on the whole time), the creature finally moves in for the kill. Several unimpressive death scenes later, ex-rapper DMX turns up with a rocket launcher and blows the 'snakigator' to kingdom come, finally putting an end to our suffering.

I don't keep my ear close to the hippity hop rap circuit. But wasn't DMX once respected and respectable? Hard to imagine when appearing in crap like this. Obviously I enjoyed it, it had a poor CGI monster, some terrible acting and some of the worst lines I've ever heard. However, even bad has been done better. Unlike Komodo, Carnosaur 3 or Mega Shark vs. Giant Octopus, I wont even bother rewatching this one. At least, not for a while. If you love your monster movies, and have gone through the regular SyFy channel schlock, you may consider giving this a view.

"I'm sorry about your wife but that was an accident. You drew us to death, that sucks."