Wedding Wars

At first glance, one might think this is a purely gay movie. If you define a gay movie as the presence of gays and gay relationships, then it might be, as you define it. But actually it is more than that. Wedding wars is one heck of a wholesome and sensible film with a nice story, an excellent script, and a good direction and music.

Wedding wars tells of the wedding of Ben and Maggie and the preparations attendant to it. While it may be said that the theme of the movie is all about wedding preparations, the film actually focused on politics and brother-to-brother relationships and how these affected the wedding plans.

Ben and Shel are close brothers since childhood who drifted apart when Shel confessed that he is gay. Shel thereafter pursued a party-planning career and met his lover Ted who is an Assistant District Attorney at Maine. Ben, on the other hand, became the campaign manager for Governor Welling who is running for reelection at Maine. In this career he met the Governor's daughter, Maggie whom he is now marrying.

In the course of their discussions about their impending wedding, Maggie suggested that Shel be their wedding planner. Despite Ben's hesitations, Maggie prevailed and so Ben visited his gay brother, Shel who, upon learning of Maggie's request, immediately accepted the responsibility. Everything about the wedding preparations is going well as the couple-to-be and Shel really starts bonding until the incumbent Governor Welling, who, ever since, did not oppose gay relationships, made a surprising political stand on television that he is supporting a constitutional amendment banning gay marriages – with a view to gaining popularity in time for his reelection bid. Incidentally, the author of that speech is none other than Ben. Shel, upon learning this, became so disgusted with his own brother that he declared a strike and picketed at the gate of the Governor's residence just two weeks before the wedding. "Why can he plan for Ben's wedding while Shel, on his part, can never ever make plans for his own wedding someday?" The characters of the story became divided as Maggie and her Mom practically sided with Shel understanding perfectly how he felt about Ben and Maggie's father.

How far this situation will take all of them is the very meat of the story. Suffice to say that I admired the movie for its lack of pretenses. It is full of love, understanding, honesty, and a heart for others. Although the plot of the story is simple, the issues involved are of significant magnitude as it touched on political and social issues transcending beyond personal and familial matters. I really liked the way that wedding changed things for the characters

Wedding Wars is one of the first attempts to look at the same sex marriage struggle on a political level albeit it is done in a slyly humorous vein.

John Stamos an openly gay man is a wedding planner and he's about to perform a labor of love, he's to organize the wedding of his brother who is marrying the daughter of the governor of his state. That governor is James Brolin who in his campaign for re-election has come out against same sex marriage.

The important thing to remember here is Brolin is a fairly liberal fellow, but sees where the political current is running and decides not to swim against it. Stamos is upset with this turn of events though by someone who had been held out to him as gay friendly and decides to do something about it.

He stages his own one man strike and his withdrawal from the wedding and picketing of the governor's mansion soon gets a lot of media attention. He doesn't win the immediate political war, but he does win the renewed love and respect from friends and family, including a brother who's life was made miserable by all the fuss.

There are many things that can birth a political activist, nothing quite succeeds as when an issue involving who you are and the limits placed on your rights because of it, hits one unexpectedly. Stamos does not play a gay stereotype, he could easily have opted for that. His character grows and develops in proportion to the political awareness.

Wedding Wars succeeds in delivering the message that rights and respect are not won from the closet. It's a nice made for TV film with a timeless message.

This film is about a gay man demanding equal marriage rights, and starting a gay rights movement by accident.

The film is so much fun to watch! It is light hearted and fun, despite approaching such a controversial subject. The plot is sweet and fun. Imagine all gays on strike! Initially the film makes fun of the stereotypically gay occupations, but it is shown that the strike quickly cascades into all aspects of the society. Yes, anyone around you can in fact be gay! The jokes are funny and work well. The cast work together so well, that it gives a vibrant feel to the film. I am impressed by Shel standing up and defending himself, and Maggie's supportive attitude over the whole matter. Coupled with Ted's reluctance towards a lifetime pledge, I think the interaction of the characters are as real life as can be.

It presents arguments on both sides of the movement, but understandably more vocal on the pro-gay marriage side. It highlights that love has no boundaries; homosexuality is not by choice. A positive message is conveyed in a balanced and non-radical way.

I really connected with this film. The ending touched me a lot. I really enjoyed watching this film!

Less fluffy than a Lifetime movie, less silly than a Will and Grace episode, and less in your face than an Aaron Sorkin production, this surprising little TV film really hit the right note. I expected it to be background noise while I wrapped holiday packages, instead, I found myself putting the wrapping paper down and watching as these fairly real characters went through the delicate dance that makes up weddings, brotherhood and gay rights in our contemporary world. Eric Dane found his niche, as he has of late, as the man who wants to do the right thing but has to get past himself to do it. Bonnie Somerville is the kind of warm person you want to know, and James Brolin a polished but "real" politician. Extra stars for John Stamos, who comes off completely comfortable in the role of a gay man who is neither flaming nor hiding, but simply "is". Smiles and kisses to Sean Maher of Firefly fame, for playing an engaging, sweet, and interestingly faceted boyfriend. HUGE thanks to A&E for airing a film that talks about gay marriage. I cannot imagine how this delicate story could offend anyone, but have a sneaking suspicion that most of the other networks would have tsk-tsked it right out the door. Enjoyable, engaging, and worth a look. I'd watch it again, and I'd recommend it...I have, in fact. Well done.

Lots of people in the gay and straight press berating this film for being too "fluffy" and making light of an important subject. The film reminded me of Kellogg's Frosted Mini Wheats.

Let me explain ... when I was a kid, I would fight any attempt by parental figures to get me to try any nutritious, whole grain cereal like Shredded Wheat. Even when told I could sprinkle sugar on the big pad of shredded wheat, it had about as much appeal to me as chewing on a piece of wood. But when they came out with Frosted Mini Wheats, smaller bite-size shredded wheat with sugar frosting on one side, it made it palatable enough for me to try.

I think that's what this made-for-TV movie was striving to do (and mostly succeeded): to take a BIG issue that isn't palatable to most people out there (gay marriage), sugar-coat it (do a fluffy comedy with stars popular to many TV viewers), and serve it up in small portions over a two hour period. IMO, this approach had the potential to educate people MORE about the issue than a gaggle of gay rights advocates and GLAAD spokespeople giving speeches could ever hope to do.

And the message *was* definitely there, though sugarcoated and inserted in small portions throughout the two hours on A&E: (1)that "civil unions" are better than nothing but fall far short of marriage in terms of equal rights and protections, (2) the fact that a majority wants something doesn't mean it is right, and even some elected officials who may personally feel that same sex marriages should be allowed are often forced into pandering to the conservative majority in this country in order to stay in office, (3) that it is likely that you have a gay or lesbian member in your family, although they may not be "out" to you, because they suspect a negative reaction (which is caused, in no small part, by the fact that so FEW of us are out to everyone, so many people don't get to actually "know" anyone who is openly gay), 4) that even some gays have a problem reconciling the concept of committing to another man "till death do us part", mostly because we have been conditioned by society not to see that as an option, and (5) just KNOWING a family member or friend is gay is different than accepting them without reservations (illustrated by the interaction between Stamos'character and his straight brother, played by Eric Dane.)

As far as the "gays on strike" concept goes, as ludicrous and unlikely as that was portrayed in the film, it still made the point that there are a hell of a lot more of us around than people think, and (contrary to what that cartoonish TV reporter thought) we are not all hairdressers, decorators and florists, but pretty much cover the entire gamut of professions and industries, making up a fairly good size chunk of this nation's economy. In the film, the "gay strike" looked like it would make it impossible to put on a big wedding, even when the event was to be held at the home of the governor of the state.

I got that some of the humor was deceivingly tongue-in-cheek, such as the magazine covers and newspaper front pages signifying that the "strike" was picking up nationwide support. If you look closely, the content of each page matches the stereotype of that publications: sensationalism for the NY Post, a fashion spread for Out, Stamos standing shirtless on Genre, as a rock star for Rolling Stone, etc. A few memorable lines (e.g., when the director on a news show decides to join the protest, the anchor repeats what he sees on the TelePrompter: "Up next, I'm out of here too, a**wipes!") I also thought that the choice of "It's Not Unusual (to be in love with anyone)" as the first song we hear at the wedding party was clever, a connotation of that song I never thought about before.

Was it a great movie? Hell, no; it was a tacky and cheaply made as MOST made-for-cable films today. Despite a few cringe-inducing scenes (his singing, pointing out that this was a good day for him to picket and show off his calves, etc.), John Stamos did a good job overall in the role of a non-stereotypical gay man (certainly as good as, or better, than anything we've ever seen on "Will & Grace"), as did Sean Maher as his lover (who wasn't sure if he was ready for marriage). But it wasn't meant to be a documentary, wasn't meant to intelligently argue the pros and cons in the gay marriage debate. It was meant to entertain the average American cable viewer and - along the way - perhaps spoon-feed them some aspects of the issue they might otherwise never have paid attention to hear. IMO, that makes the film worth acknowledging and worth encouraging others to see.