Apokalypse Eis

Honestly, I don't understand why they called this movie post-impact. When you title post-impact, you think of how people might be able to survive after the impact of a meteorite.... Well that's not the issue on this movie, the true issue is about the guy trying to come back to rescue his daughter and wife who got trapped in the disaster zone.... no no no.... I'm sorry that's not the issue. the issue was about saving the world from a crazy genocide who controls a massive destruction weapon.... no no no that was wrong too, the issue is about an infiltrated enemy who tries to get control of the weapon to jack up the prices of oil... no no no, I'm sorry the issue is about restoring the world to its initial state prior to the meteorite impact. No I'm sorry that was not the issue either... The issue is about... Yikes, The truth is I can't summarize the movie. In fact, I really don't know what the movie was all about.

Did you ever read "Time of the Great Freeze" by Robert Silverberg or go see "Damnation Alley?"

If so, then you've seen this film before--only this time, it's a post Tunguska-like comet impact instead of World War III and no giant cockroaches this time. Dean Cain and a husky named "Sasquatch" lead a team through Ice Age Europe to rescue lost scientists trapped in Berlin in Landmaster-like vehicles. A B-movie science fiction film with all of the associated trappings. Not too bad digital special effects.

Turn off your brain and enjoy, then go get "Damnation Alley" for a (slightly) better performance.

do not watch this movie. I have to go with some/most of the other commentators, admitting I have not been able to finish it. The acting is abysmal and makes cardboard characters look lively. The plot is confused and harebrained. Don't waste your life in front of the TV, go outside, to the beach, shopping, do your laundry, just do something other than watch this movie, pretty much ANYTHING is better.

I actually wanted to submit this now, but the IMDb guidelines demand I submit at least 10 lines. I'm having a hard time writing anything more about this low point of movie history. Well, I liked the dog - one of the best actors in the whole movie!

Throw science out the window along with any ideas about plot development, character development and plausible story lines. The special effects are really "special," too. Much of it looks like something you would see in a video game. In fact, I wonder if they didn't just film some shots from a video game to save money.

I enjoyed the film, however, for the laughs. It keeps you wondering just how bad it can get. Just when you think it can't get any sillier-- it surprises you and does.

Just to give you an idea of how bad it is-- the main character is supposedly obsessed with getting back to the zone where he left his wife and daughter, yet he quickly drops his gloom when this British chick sheds her clothes and joins him in the shower. Only moments later, he is clearly hitting on the German chick. Of course, we know he is sensitive and caring, because every now and then he drops his gaze and supposedly thinks of the family he abandoned.

This was a German co-production. I thought the Germans were smarter.

Only two small things stop Post Impact from scoring any lower, and those are Dean Cain, who tries his best though he has been much better, and the dog, who is adorable, very well-trained and certainly the best actor in Post Impact. Which is not entirely complimentary seeing as the rest of the acting is so stiff that wooden planks are more animated in comparison. The worst was Joanna Taylor, a total blank and there is nothing appealing about her. They are saddled by the shallow ciphers that the movie passes for characters and some of the most stilted dialogue, that is far too heavy on the small-talk, of any movie seen recently. Post Impact is also edited in a frenzied and unfinished manner and the special effects are on par with some of the worst effects from the 70s-80s. In short, very cheap and out of date. The music is generic and repetitive and the sound and sound effects are very muddied, the gun shots lack authenticity and any crucial dialogue is made difficult to hear or properly understand. Even worse is the story, plodding and ridiculous, with an out-of-place sex scene, one of the stupidest endings of any movie from the past ten years or so and countless mistakes and goofs that take away from everything. It was also not easy to tell what the basic story was, and the movie itself probably didn't either, seeing how much it jumped around to the point of near-incoherence. On the whole, with the exceptions of Cain and the dog a waste of time, though personally there are worse movies out there. 2/10 Bethany Cox