Shark Attack 3: Megalodon

I really don't think I've ever seen a film that was worse than this one. At the piece of dialogue that is commonly referred to as 'THE LINE' I actually HAD to call my friend with whom I've seen lots of movies lately. I told him what the movie was about and we watched the finale 'together', him on the phone, me doing the live reporting from behind the screen. Laughing out loud almost all the time.

I don't think there's a single one of this films atrocities left that hasn't already been commented on, but it really keeps you roaring with laughter the whole 90 minutes. Oh... maybe there is something I didn't hear anybody rant about. The marlin footage. Was that seventies? Sixties maybe? Was it even in color? And really... What was that guy having sex for? And did I really pick up the suggestion that that woman was his fathers (?) wife???

If you enjoy B-movies, this is one for you, plenty of nudity, a Tom Cruise look-a-like and even more stock shark footage. If that's not enough, the lead lady was actually in the first Shark Attack movie as a different character. This one makes me want to see the other two with my friends and laugh until I get sick. You really can appreciate a movie like this if you were an avid MST3K watcher. Oh yeah, contains the CORNIEST LINE EVER! You will not miss it, trust me.

Shark Attack 3 is truly an awful movie, but that doesn't mean you shouldn't grab some friends and popcorn and spend your evening watching it. It is so awful, the acting so campy, the special effects so cheesy, the dialog so terrible and the plot so contrived from Jaws that this movie is a must see. The sharks are nothing more than stock footage (and how does stock footage eat people? you ask...oh, you'll see!), the Mexican actors are, in actuality, Russian/Bulgarian, and there are some truly unforgettable scenes. Not to mention a rather dirty pick-up line...

I've seen some bad movies in my day, but I must admit that Shark Attack 3 truly takes the cake. Go check it out yourself. (But avoid Shark Attacks 1 and 2, they're reportedly decent.)

PS I changed the ten to a one since a lot of SA3 'fans' want it in the Bottom 100. I agree.

This movie is pretty much at the top of the bad movie food chain. I laughed at literally every scene, I don't know how they managed to make a simple thing like the hero typing an email funny but they did.

The first thing you notice about the movie is the shark is either shown as shark footage (which is fair enough) or something that looks like it was made in Microsoft paint. I'm guessing bad actors are drawn to bad scripts like sharks to chum and this chum is especially fishy. Witness the security guard who just has to say a couple of simple lines but is quite clearly reading from a cue card he can't quite see. Most movies would cut him out, especially as the scene is pointless.

I also especially liked the helicopter pilot, if a man doesn't twitch a muscle at the sight of a 100ft shark then it's hard to imagine anything in life really moving him. Maybe he's just feeling down because his helicopter is quite clearly a toy or maybe he's just bemused because the shark grunts like a pig throughout the film.

The best scene doesn't involve the shark at all. They're stood on the beach and our hero delivers one of the worst lines ever written. If you've seen the movie you know the one, if not then you have the right to discover the beauty of it yourself.

Probably the funniest film ever made, no bad movie shelf is complete without it. Fingers crossed they make another one with the exact same cast and writer.

I can say in all seriousness that this film is the funniest I have ever had the good fortune to watch. The fact that the humor is unintentional only makes it that much better (unless this is all a joke and it really is supposed to be this bad). In any case, anyone who feels like their life is going poorly, just remember: not once, at any point in your life have you ever produced anything half as bad as this movie. Everything about this movie, from the script to the acting and, especially, to the special effects, is literally laugh-out-loud funny. I strongly strongly recommend Shark Attack 3: Megalodon to anyone who hasn't revelled in its B-movie glory.