Autopsy: A Love Story

Lonely morgue assistant Charlie Bickle (John Scott Mills) acquires 'healthy' anonymous corpses so that his boss, Dr. Dale Brodsky (Joe Estevez), can harvest their organs for sale on the black market; but when Charlie falls for his latest 'Jane Doe' (Dina Osmussen), he spares her this gruesome fate, instead keeping her body intact (at least until it starts to decay) for tender moments of late night romance.

Twisted, dark and humorous: three words that grace the DVD cover for Autopsy: A Love story. Well I've got three more: dull, cheap, and amateurish. Oh, and here's another three: waste of time. And while I'm at it, have these as well: mind numbing garbage.

Corpse lovin' can make for some seriously deviant cinema, but having read that Autopsy aims for psychological horror rather than visceral vulgarity, the last thing I expected was another Nekromantik or Aftermath; on the other hand, I hadn't reckoned on being bored out of my skull by an hour and a half of inept shot-on-video dreck either. With awful acting, dire direction and a plot that is even more lifeless than its leading lady, Autopsy stinks higher than a three week old stiff.

I have seen Meet the Spartans and some other movies that actually made me depressed for having wasted so many minutes of my life, but I have grown smarter now that I'm older and fast forward to the nudity if it doesn't look like a promising movie. Well fast-forwarded all the way through and NO NUDITY so I'm just like sod this, especially after I saw the low rating it already received on IMDb. From the first five minutes you can tell this was a low-budget film with bad directing thus bad acting. No nudity, no violence, no redeeming qualities except the fact that this is one more movie that I have rated on IMDb and I did borrow this for free from the local library. But you couldn't pay me $10 to sit and watch the whole thing through, or even $20.

Lonely, love-hungry mortuary attendant, Charlie Bickle (John Scott Mills) is trapped in a dead-end relationship, spending his long dour days illegally harvesting organs for his vastly corrupt boss, Dr. Dale Brodsky (Joe Estevez). He 'aint no average working stiff, while shy, introverted and awkward in public, Charlie positively comes alive with the dead! Amusingly bizarre, sordidly sardonic, 'Autopsy: A Love Story' is arguably one of the more eccentric terror titles disgorged by the fiendishly independent gore-mongers at Brain Damage Films. A low budget necromantic comedy horror treat about the tacky travails of an all American boy and his dead girl next door! Livid with grisly gallows humour, there's a wealth of ice-cool passion and sweet moments of tender open-hearted romance in, Guy Crawford's mirthfully macabre, morgue-set love affair!

On a day seemingly like any other, Charlie fatefully meets the girl of his screams, Jane Doe, pale, beautiful, serene, ceaselessly obliging, and quite dead, and on this auspicious day, Charlie demonstratively puts pay to the notion that he couldn't get laid in a morgue! Not for all tastes, Autopsy A Love Story is an amusingly warped admixture of John Waters, H. G Lewis, and Paul Bartel, a blackly funny text enlivened by a choice number of delicious lapses into bad taste! Crawford's morbid DTV melodrama is blessed with a splendidly game cast of actors, with surprisingly nuenced performances from scar-crossed lovers, John Scott Mills and, Dina Osmussen, and a juicily unfiltered turn by B-Movie legend, Joe Estevez. Funnier than Alien Autopsy, more romantic than Psychos in Love, Autopsy: A Love Story grimly opens up a darker vein of cold blooded comedy.

The lonely Charlie Bickle (John Scott Mills) works in a morgue owned by the corrupt Dr. Dale Brodsky (Joe Estevez) cremating bodies and lives with his crippled wife Mary (Ginny Harman). Dr. Dale illegally sells body parts before the cremation, bribing dirty policemen. When Charlie meets the suicidal Jane Doe (Dina Osmussen), he falls in love for her and dates the corpse until her twin sister comes to the morgue seeking her missing sister.

"Autopsy: A Love Story" is a very cheap production, actually almost amateurish, that has an intriguing, original and bizarre screenplay that works most of the time and captivates the attention until the last scene, and two good lead actors, John Scott Mills and Dina Osmussen. Unfortunately the histrionic Joe Estevez has another ham performance with his character that is neither dark nor funny. I liked this film because I am fan of weird movies, but I do not recommend it to average viewers that like blockbusters. My vote is five.

Title (Brazil): "Autópsia - Uma História de Amor" ("Autopsy - A Love Story")

My friend and I saw the summary for this movie and found it online. We watched it simply because it seemed like the most peculiar plot ever. As it turns out, we were right. The plot was easy enough to follow, in fact at times too easy. They practically screamed the back story, in extreme detail. Another problem I found was how annoying the one character was. Not only did she crave constant contact with the main character, she was selfish and whiny. I didn't like her at all.

On the upside, though, this movie is good for a laugh--especially the makeup and interaction with the dead girl. I managed to find it for two bucks online, so for me it was worth watching it.