- Insp. Andy Dalziel: Are you a naturalised citizen?
- Maurice Arany: Yes.
- Insp. Andy Dalziel: I bet you'd like to go back to Hungary after all these years, eh. Take a little look.
- Maurice Arany: You cannot deport me.
- Insp. Andy Dalziel: [grinning] I wouldn't dream of it. Not while I can violate your human rights over here.
- [Dalziel tells Pascoe how Haggard used to get the boys in his school to beat him with a cane; Pascoe looks po-faced]
- Insp. Andy Dalziel: What's up, Inspector? Miscalculated a fart?
- Sgt. Peter Pascoe: Which side of the house do you sleep?
- Alice Andover: [looks horrified and embarrassed] Eh?
- Annabelle Andover: Don't be silly, Alice. My sister's a virgin, Inspector, and nowadays it shows.
- [discussing an interview with a suspect]
- Insp. Andy Dalziel: So, Godfrey Blengdale's a member of the Cally Club. And him a clean-rectummed Alderman and Justice of the Peace with a class-act "county" wife. Well, well, well!
- Det Sgt Edgar Wield: According to Mr Arany's statement...
- Insp. Andy Dalziel: It took him long enough to deliver. You didn't bounce him off t'wall hard enough, did you?
- Det Sgt Edgar Wield: [pompously] We observed the correct procedures, Sir - at all times.
- Insp. Andy Dalziel: No wonder he messed you about. There's a moral there, Sergeant.
- Det Sgt Edgar Wield: Anyroad, according to Arany he left Mr Blengdale with Dr Haggard at about 11:15 on the night of the murder.
- Insp. Andy Dalziel: Then some stupid sod best have a word with Godfrey "Call Me God" Blengdale... hadn't he?
- Det Sgt Edgar Wield: Meaning me, Sir?
- Insp. Andy Dalziel: No, Sergeant, modestly I was alluding to myself.