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Jake Gyllenhaal in Bubble Boy (2001)

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Bubble Boy

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  • Jimmy: I saw the sign outside and it said that you had five hundred dollars.
  • Emcee: You want five hundred dolla?
  • Jimmy: Yes, I would like five hundred dollars.
  • Emcee: You want five hundred dolla?
  • Jimmy: Yes please, I would like five hundred dollars.
  • Emcee: You want five hundred dolla?
  • Jimmy: Yes I want five hundred dolla!
  • Emcee: Five hundred dolla!
  • Jimmy: Five hundred dolla!
  • Emcee: Five hundred dolla!
  • Jimmy: Five hundred dolla!
  • Jimmy: I'd rather spend one minute holding you than the rest of my life knowing that I never could.
  • Jimmy: I'm Jimmy.
  • Chloe: I'm Chloe.
  • Jimmy: Chloe! The whore next door!
  • Chloe: What? Where did you hear that?
  • Jimmy: My Mom, she teaches me everything.
  • Chloe: Well, really, she got it wrong. I'm actually more of a bitch than a whore.
  • Jimmy: A bitch. Oh yeah, a bitch. Absolutely a bitch.
  • Mrs. Livingston: "Dear Mr. and Ms. Livingston, we have kidnapped your son. Give us $100,000 dollars or he dies. Signed, the Jews." Are you kidding? ARE YOU KIDDING? Who in their right mind is going to believe this note Morton? THEY'RE THE JEWS. THEY'RE GOING TO WANT MORE THAN $100,000!
  • Mrs. Livingston: And then Pinocchio came out of his plastic bubble and touched the filthy little whore next door and died. The End!
  • Jimmy: How far will this get me?
  • bus stop man: Take a step back.
  • [Jimmy steps back]
  • bus stop man: That far.
  • Mr. Livingston: Kind of makes you wonder... What would have happened if Neil Armstrong had gone all the way to the moon and then never stepped on the surface?
  • Mr. Livingston: tell him.
  • Mrs. Livingston: what are you talking about, tell him what.
  • Mr. Livingston: He's not dead. Your not dead, Jimmy.
  • Mrs. Livingston: He's lying, Jimmy.
  • Mr. Livingston: tell him, tell him everything.
  • Mrs. Livingston: you're not dead, Jimmy.
  • Jimmy: Open his eyes: I'm not?
  • Pushpop: [after hitting a cow] Have you ever been karmically bitch-slapped by a six-armed goddess?
  • [shouts]
  • Pushpop: I'll take that as a no!
  • Chloe: I should go. How about tomorrow?
  • Jimmy: Oh jeez, I don't know. I don't know bitch, I got a lot to do!
  • [Addressing a rough-looking Mexican by a broken-down Harley]
  • Jimmy: I might have something that could help your situation here...
  • Slim: [threatening him with knife] What? What you got that's gonna help?
  • Jimmy: Patches.
  • Slim: Patches? I could use some stinking patches.
  • Mrs. Livingston: ...and the prince climbed up Rapunzel's hair to the top of the tower and said, "Come with me, and we'll live happily ever after." Then Rapunzel left her plastic bubble and died. The end.
  • Slim: What are you, some kind of Astronaut?
  • Jimmy: No, I'm some kind of bubble boy.
  • Lorraine: Back off, bitch, he's the messiah.
  • Mrs. Livingston: Well, you'll certainly be in my prayers tonight. And I'll be praying you get nut cancer!
  • Jimmy: [laughing] You guys aren't a singing group... you're a cult!
  • Gil: Yes, the Round One. A holy messenger trapped in a living globe. We must find him and release him so that he will carry us, the only true believer, to the Kingdom of Heaven, while those who reject him will mutate and burn eternally on Planet PX41, and Planet PX42 if they run out of room. Now, if there are no further questions, let's move on to the buffet.
  • [after killing a cow]
  • Pushpop: I'm coming back as a cock-a-roach. Yes, definitely a cock-a-roach.
  • Dr. Phreak: Mini? Me? I'm not mini.
  • Jimmy: I pledge allegiance to the flag of the United States of America and to the republic of which it stands one nation under God indivisible with liberty and justice for all...
  • [looks down and says faster]
  • Jimmy: I pledge allegiance to the flag of the United States of America and to the republic of which it stands one nation under God indivisible.
  • Jimmy: Dog poo this is awesome
  • Mark: [In strange voice] I'm not a monster, I'm a human being!
  • Jimmy: Supper time was the best! Nothing could beat Mom's homemade, vitamin-rich, soy-based, germ-free, fat-free fiber cookies.
  • [while leading a pack of boys chasing the Ice Cream & Curry truck...]
  • Ice Cream Boy: Ice Cream. Ice Cream.
  • Indian Boy: Curry. Curry.
  • Emcee: [Hands envelope to Chloe] Here, for your honeymoon!
  • Chloe: What is it?
  • Emcee: 500 dolla!
  • Chloe: 500 dollars?
  • Emcee: 500 dolla!
  • Jimmy: 500 dollars?
  • Emcee: 500 dolla!
  • Jimmy: 500 dolla!
  • Emcee: 500 dolla!
  • Jimmy: 500 dolla!
  • Emcee: 500 dolla!
  • Jimmy: 500 dolla!
  • Slim: Don't live in regret, ese!
  • Jimmy: Pappy told me about Poon
  • [bang]
  • Jimmy: , but he never said anything about Poonanny, Pippy.
  • Dr. Phreak: He stole my freaks that son of a bitch.
  • Mrs. Livingston: My. What a potty mouth you have.
  • Dr. Phreak: screw you lady!
  • Dr. Phreak: Oh, that's so beautiful. I too was in love once... for 10 minutes! Then I kicked her ass out of the car!
  • Jimmy: [narrating] I had my reading.
  • Jimmy, 8 Years Old: [reading a Highlights magazine] I wish they had more than one magazine in the world, Mom.
  • Mrs. Livingston: So do I, dear.
  • Jimmy: [narrating] My favourite T.V. show, "Land Of The Lost".
  • Jimmy, 10 Years Old: [while watching television] I wish T.V.'s had more than one channel, Mom.
  • Mrs. Livingston: So do I, dear.
  • Jimmy: [narrating] And I had the best teacher in the whole wide world.
  • Jimmy, 10 Years Old: [reading an essay] "And then, the Indians decided to move to the reservations, where they could open casinos and sell tax-free cigarettes, and stay out of the white man's way.
  • Mrs. Livingston: Another A-plus.

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