An extremely arrogant male photographer (Anthony Addabbo), an old, scraggly ships captain who constantly bleats about how to tie a rope knot, an American babe who doesnt like to be rejected and a whole gang of gorgeous bad-ass models. So what is wrong with this film? Since Black Sea doesnt really have any artistic quality to it it would be stupid to say that the feeble and inconsistent plot ruined the movie. Admittedly, the plot and the acting are lacking, but the babes are unmissable. Thats really the only good thing about it, the women. Their strength, their determination, their triumph, their beauty, their legs ...
Imagine a group of models soaking in an enormous hot tup, arms around each other, bodies naked, wet and steamy, discussing a huge scam they are about to pull in international arms dealing.
But then wait... Gabe who is the male chauvanist photographer and only screws whores must be otherwise amused while the girls are loading the cargo onto the ship they are about to leave in. So Ursula (Jacquiline Lovell) is sent to occupy him. This, of course, means she has to get him into bed. But since he only does whores she has to go to his regular shagging pub and switch places with the real prostitute. How logical. They should have just admitted that Ursula liked his ass instead of trying to work it in to some kind of weird conspiracy. As if Gabe is going to be spending his night hanging around the docks peeking at peoples private business anyway. Except for Lovell the model/terrorists are mostly Russian recruits. Sexy Vera Sotnikova is the supposed leader and the girlfriend of thug Dean but unfortunately she gets blown up in the end. There is an ironic scene where the girls are playing cards below deck with their little sailor boys sitting submissively behind them.
But then they ruin that by showing them all shagging in a mass orgy later on. It would have been much better if their werent so many men in it, and if Gabe didnt play quite such a major role -by the way he doesnt turn out to be the pig with the heart of gold in the end. On the contrary, the last scene implies that Ursula becomes his regular lay at the whore-house (was he paying for it, she takes a step down in the world... "hmmm... should I be a terrorist slash model, ....or should I be a prostitute?")
There is a really sexy lesbian scene between a gorgeous but mute model and Gabriels assistant, Annie. The only actors I recognised were Brion James (his usual type of trash) and Timothy Bottoms. I liked it that the girls were Russians, the accents made the whole crime thing seem more dramatic.
I wont lie, the film is trashy and cheap. But perhaps with the right mood (and a J or two) a lot of people could see the beauty of it's simplicity, not to laugh at it but maybe to become inspired by its ambiguity and to smile at its raw amatuarishness.
