- Shredder: Babies! They're babies!
- Professor Jordan Perry: What did you expect? They'd come out quoting "Macbeth"?
- Shredder: They are stupid!
- Professor Jordan Perry: Well, they're not stupid, they're infants.
- Rahzar: [knocks Tokka on the head with a metal pole] Bang!
- Tokka: Ow!
- Professor Jordan Perry: Okay, they're stupid infants.
- [last lines]
- Splinter: Were you seen?
- Leonardo: Of course not, Master Splinter.
- Donatello: We practiced Ninja.
- Michaelangelo: [off camera] The art of invisibility.
- [appears from behind Raph]
- Splinter: [holds up the New York Post, with a front page picture of the turtles on stage, with the headline "Ninja Rap is Born!"] Practice harder.
- [the turtles groan]
- Splinter: Ten flips, now! And remember:
- [quoting the song played at the show]
- Splinter: "Go Ninja, go Ninja, go!" I made another funny!
- [laughs]
- Leonardo: Take the ugly one!
- Raphael: No, you take the ugly one!
- Donatello: I'll take the ugly one.
- Michaelangelo: Which one's the ugly one?
- Splinter: Their world can never be ours.
- Michaelangelo: Uh... Not even pizza?
- Splinter: [after pause] Pizza's okay.
- [the turtles sigh with relief]
- Michaelangelo: Man, give a guy a heart attack.
- April O'Neil: Chief Sterns! I wonder if I might ask you a few more questions, off the record?
- Chief Sterns: Ms. O'Neil, my record on the record clearly shows that I have no "off the record" record, make a record of that!
- [after Leo starts conversation about the Foot]
- Raphael: We kicked their butts. They're all in jail. Besides, we took out the Shredder. So what's everyone so worried about, anyway?
- Donatello: He's right.
- Leonardo: No, Splinter took out the Shredder!
- Donatello: They're both right.
- Raphael: Yeah, yeah. I was there, Leo, remember? Ol' Shred did a swan dive, with a half gainer, right into the back of a garbage truck! AAAAAHHHH!
- Donatello: Hey, is this gonna work?
- [regarding the donut idea]
- Michaelangelo: Is, like, Schwarzenegger hard to spell?
- [Donatello prepares to spell but realizes its true]
- Michaelangelo: Yeah.
- [the turtles walk out into the middle of the construction site]
- Donatello: Pretty quiet.
- Raphael: [shouts and breaks the eerie silence] Shredder!
- Donatello: [grabs Raphael] Thanks, Raph. I may never have the hiccups again!
- April O'Neil: Where's Splinter?
- Leonardo: He's been on the roof ever since he saw your report.
- April O'Neil: Doing what?
- Splinter: Coming.
- [appears in window]
- Splinter: To a decision.
- Michaelangelo: I've said it before, and I'll say it again.
- Michaelangelo, Leonardo, Donatello, Raphael: Man, I love being a turtle!
- Raphael: Too bad the Shredder can't say the same thing.
- Splinter: What troubles you, my son?
- Donatello: I-I don't know. I just thought there would be more to it; to the ooze, to you know, us!
- Leonardo: I know!
- Donatello: I just always thought there would be something that... I thought we'd find out we were special.
- Splinter: Do not confuse the professor's words with your current worth, my son.
- Donatello: But I don't believe him! There's just got to be more to it!
- Michaelangelo: Ahh, ninja pizza!
- Donatello: Ninja pizza?
- Michaelangelo: Pizza that vanish quickly without trace!
- Michaelangelo: Hey, guys, check this!
- [he uses brushes to imitate 'The Karate Kid']
- Michaelangelo: Wax on, wax off. Wax on...
- Raphael: Mouth off!
- Donatello: Hey, everyone's a critic.
- Michaelangelo: Guys, guys! I've just thought of something. Two words that'll solve all our housing problems! Time share!
- Donatello: [taps on Michaelangelo's head] Hmmm, not quite ripe yet.
- Leonardo: I'm Leonardo.
- Michaelangelo: I'm Michaelangelo.
- Donatello: Donatello.
- Raphael: I'm Raphael!
- Michaelangelo: All the good ones end in "O"!
- [cooking up an anti-mutagen to transform Tokka and Rahzar]
- Michaelangelo: You think this stuff is gonna work?
- Donatello: Well, we won't know for sure until we spray those guys.
- Professor Jordan Perry: Well, actually...
- Donatello: Actually?
- Professor Jordan Perry: Actually... ingestion is the only course.
- Michaelangelo: You mean they have to eat it?
- Professor Jordan Perry: Affirmative. Yes. Yo. Right on... my man.
- [about to leave April's apartment, having seen Raph's foot pretruding from behind the changing curtain and becoming suspicious about their weapons "she" has lying around]
- Keno: One last thing, though. I think you might want to know about THIS!
- [slams his foot on Raph's]
- Raphael: ARGH!
- [Raph comes out from behind the curtain]
- Keno: It's you guys!
- [cluthching his foot and being held back by Donny, Leo, and Mikey]
- Raphael: Ah, ah! Let me hurt him. Please! Tell me I can hurt him! Please, please! Grr!
- [Splinter puts his hand on Keno's shoulder]
- Splinter: I think you'd better sit down.
- [Keno sees Splinter and faints]
- April O'Neil: [picks up phone] Donny?
- Donatello: April...
- April O'Neil: Where are you guys? Did you find a new place to live yet?
- Donatello: Yeah, we'll bring you down. We've only had time to pick up Splinter and get a few essentials.
- Michaelangelo: [holding out a bag of potato chips] Yeah, the bare essentials.
- Donatello: The reason while we're calling is, have you seen Raphael by any chance?
- April O'Neil: Raphael? Why, is he missing?
- Leonardo: You know, there is still a little more stuff to help with, Michaelangelo!
- Michaelangelo: Hey! I'm helping Donny!
- [tries to pry the phone from him]
- Michaelangelo: Gimme the phone!
- Donatello: NO!
- [flips Michaelangelo to the ground]
- Donatello: So you haven't seen him at all then, huh?
- Leonardo: Well, if she has, tell him thanks for wasting our time, because instead of going to look for the ooze like we should, we gotta go out and look for him instead!
- [slams box on Donatello's foot]
- Donatello: Owww!
- April O'Neil: What was that?
- Donatello: Leo says hi!
- Michaelangelo: Gimme the phone! Gimme the phone!
- Donatello: Oh, all right, all right, here!
- Michaelangelo: April, this is Mikey, I'd just like to say: HELLOOOOO.
- [kissing noises]
- Donatello: Would you give me that!
- [April laughs as they start arguing again]
- Leonardo: Turtle-rific
- Raphael: Max-a-mundo!
- Donatello: Accapella!
- Raphael: Huh?
- Donatello: Uhhh... Perestroika?
- Michaelangelo: Uhh...
- Donatello: Ok, I got it... Frère Jacques.
- [starts singing]
- Donatello: Frère Jacques, Frère Jacques...
- Michaelangelo: Donny, give it up!
- Professor Jordan Perry: This is bad! Carbon dioxide is essential to the anti-mutanagenic process. Their burping is probably retarding the reaction.
- Donatello: Is there anyway to speed it back up?
- Professor Jordan Perry: Well the reintroduction of CO2 could act as a catalyst.
- Donatello: Yeah. Hmm.
- Professor Jordan Perry: The problem is finding a ready supply.
- [Walks over to a nearby fire extinguisher and takes it off the wall, showing it to Donatello]
- Donatello: Genius. Pure genius.
- Leonardo: [the Turtles say their farewells to April before entering the sewers] See ya, April.
- April O'Neil: Bye.
- [Leo hops into the sewers]
- Raphael: Wish us luck.
- [Hops in]
- Donatello: We'll be back for Splinter.
- [Hops in]
- Michaelangelo: [Imitating Humphrey Bogart] Well, the lives of two people don't amount to a hill o' beans in this crazy world, Elsa. That's why you're getting on that plane.
- [April laughs]
- Michaelangelo: Maybe not today, maybe not tomorrow...
- Leonardo: [Yanks Mikey into the sewer] Will you come on?
- Michaelangelo: YEOW!
- [smoke bomb was set off]
- Donatello: Oh, great.
- Leonardo: Terrific.
- Raphael: Wonderful.
- Michaelangelo: Bummer.
- [Michaelangelo is crunching noisily on a candy bar]
- Raphael: [sarcastically] Hey Mikey, do you think you could crunch a little louder? I can still hear out of this one!
- Professor Jordan Perry: Four walking, talking turtles.
- Raphael: [sarcastically] Yeah, the guy's Ph.D material all right.
- April O'Neil: And they said if you don't mean them at the construction site tonight...
- Donatello: What?
- April O'Neil: He said he'd send out Tokka and Rahzar again. This time into Central Park.
- Donatello: Central Park? How are they gonna avoid all of those... people?
- Michaelangelo: Then, there is no choice but to meet as the Shredder wishes.
- [the turtles face Tokka and Rahzar for the first time]
- Raphael: Well, you know what they say? The bigger they are...
- [runs and jump-kicks Rahzar but rebounds and crashes to the floor]
- Michaelangelo: ...The more bones they break.
- Shredder: [after Tatsu locks a wolf and a snapping turtle into small cells] And these are the two most vicious animals you could find?
- [Tatsu nods]
- Shredder: Good. Professor?
- Professor Jordan Perry: Preparations are complete, however...
- Shredder: Begin.
- Professor Jordan Perry: However, I feel free to re-register my original protest and remind you of the immense dangers of...
- [Tatsu squares up to him and growls]
- Professor Jordan Perry: ...That's enough talk from me. We'll begin.
- April O'Neil: [after the investigation of the street Tokka and Rahzar rampaged the night before] Were there any large tooth or claw marks found?
- Chief Sterns: How did you know that... I have no idea what you're talking about?
- Michaelangelo: [bad guy approaches him] Wait! Can we talk?
- [bad guy grabs him by the hands and begins spinning him in circles]
- Michaelangelo: W-w-woah! Major spin cycle! Wooooah! Hey, Leo!
- Leonardo: [spots Michaelangelo] Mikey?
- Michaelangelo: Maybe I should have brought...
- [bad guy releases him, sending him flying through the air]
- Michaelangelo: ... BAGELS!
- [he crashes into a wall, then stands up dizzy]
- Michaelangelo: Woah. Now I know what a postal package feels like.
- [April stands over a sewer grate and under an umbrella in the pouring rain. The turtles drop down one by one, but Michelangelo stops and faces her wearing a fedora]
- Michaelangelo: Well, the lives of two people don't amount to a hill of beans in this crazy world, Ilsa. That's why you're getting on that plane...
- [April laughs]
- Michaelangelo: Maybe not today, maybe not tomorrow...
- [Leonardo grabs him and pulls him down]
- April O'Neil: Listen, I have reason to believe that this was caused by two... *really* big animals.
- Chief Sterns: Ah, and what sort of animals might these be, Miss O'Neil?
- April O'Neil: Well, I can't say exactly...
- Chief Sterns: Uh-huh, and what makes you believe that they did this?
- April O'Neil: Well, I can't say that either, but...
- Chief Sterns: Okay and is there anything else you'd like not to tell me?
- Raphael: This is stupid. We got the Foot up there with the ooze and we're down here playing Century 21.