- Randy Cellini: He started it.
- Horn: [to Barry] If that's true, kid, you have less brains than a woodpecker on an aluminum telephone pole.
- Kelly Stone: Chuck Norris? Chuck Norris? He doesn't compete anymore, kid, and the main reason, one of the main reasons he doesn't compete anymore is me. He doesn't compete 'cause I would kick his ass.
- [a still somewhat asthmatic Barry is determined to join in the push-ups in gym class]
- Horn: Gabrewski, if you die I'm going to shoot myself and come on after you!
- Jerry Gabrewski: [Jerry smells that drink that Mr. Lee has given Barry] What is that smell?
- Barry: I don't know.
- Jerry Gabrewski: It must be a sewage backup around here.