Ich, der Richter

This so-so detective yarn feels more like a TV movie than the noir-ish piece of cinema you might expect from a Spillane novel. But it has a few moments.

What makes this movie worth watching is the smoking Nicaraguan beauty Barbara Carrera. She has a fully-nude love scene that steals the show. If you're a Barbara Carrera fan, you should rent this movie and fast-forward to that scene (a little over 1 hour into the movie). You won't be disappointed.

Private Detective Mike Hammer (Armand Assante) investigates the murder of his friend Jack Williams who lost his arm to the Tet Offensive. Pat Chambers (Paul Sorvino) is the lead police detective in the case. Jack's wife Myrna reveals that they had been going to sex therapist Dr. Charlotte Bennett. His investigation connects Mike to a secret military program with help from his beautiful secretary Velda. Soon, they're hunted by mysterious agents. Mike follows the gun to mobster Charles Kalecki (Alan King).

Finding the bug seems very random. There are conveniences and contrivances. It's fine for an 80's action movie. It has the harden charisma of Assante although there is a bit of European coolness about him. It gives Hammer a nice sexiness. The plot is quite convoluted which borders on a Bond movie. Instead of a noir pulp detective, Bond does seem like the bigger inspiration. It's not until he gets a little bloodied that it starts to feel noir. There is even a bevy of Bond beauties. The only thing missing is the exotic locations. It's strictly New York City and that's perfectly good with its remaining sleaze. It fits the sex and violence. The production is closer to TV level except for the R-rated elements.

This actually a combination of two Spillane books "I the Jury" and "The Body Lovers" This is not a great film, but good. The action and plot are pretty good and Assante gives a decent performance, but the thing that I remember the most is just how damn sexy Barbara Carrera is in this movie. I watched this movie with my mom on cinemax one night when I was in junior high school and I had to sit with a pillow on my lap. She blows away Sharon Stone in Basic Instinct. She's very tempting at the end when she confronts Mike Hammer and he's got to make a life and death decision. This movie belongs to her. She has been good in other movies, but this is her best performance. It's worth watching for any fan of Barbara Carrera and sleazy action movies

I THE JURY (1982), the first Mike Hammer movie since THE GIRL HUNTERS (1963). This was a half-hearted attempt to bring Hammer into the modern world-- or something. Armand Assante's too short & skinny, his accent's all wrong & he seems too laid-back about all the nastiness going on, like he's a wise-guy when he should be a dangerous Neanderthal. Laurene Landon's pretty, but she seems too helpless when the going gets rough-- and she's blonde! (Velda's supposed to be a brunette, how hard is it to get even the simple details right?) Paul Sorvino as Pat Chambers isn't bad, but he gets forced to involve Hammer against his will, while in the original, he happily fed Mike all the info he could, knowing Mike would not be held back by rules & regulations the way he would be as a cop. The highlight of the film is no doubt Barbara Carerra, who gets to have one HOT nude sex scene about 2/3rds of the way in-- but it doesn't seem like she's really given much chance to act. Her lack of ability, or just a director who has NO IDEA what he's doing? Someone said this looked and felt like a "tv movie"-- the only difference being, the excessive graphic violence, nudity & sex. And while the original I THE JURY was a very complex plot, which left you marvel at the way such a "thug" on the outside as Hammer could figure it out when nobody else could, here, too much is spelled out for the audience, and yet, not enough is spelled out clearly for any of it to really make sense. OY! Bill Conti tries his best with a high-powered jazz score, but it's no FOR YOUR EYES ONLY.

It's a fun flick and can be enjoyed for exactly what it is. But watching this again really makes me wish I had a good copy of the Biff Elliot film...

"I The Jury" delivers about what you would expect from a 1980s action film. Armand Asante is the cocky private detective, hunting his best friend's killer. He bends the rules without investigation, leaving a trail of dead bodies and explosions. Geoffrey Lewis is a welcome addition, playing a recluse who points Assante in the right direction to begin the mayhem. There are strong sexy scenes with Assante and Barbara Carrera. There are some creative kills, like death by hot griddle, and the photography is certainly colorful. The story itself involves a government coverup utilizing a sex clinic as a front for their operations. All of this is sometimes difficult to follow, but things move along brisk enough to maintain interest. - MERK