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Buster hat nichts zu lachen (1931)

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Buster hat nichts zu lachen

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  • Bailiff: [very quickly] DoYouSwearToTellTheTruth,AndNothingButTheTruth,SoHelpYouGod?
  • Harmon: ...Huh?
  • Bailiff: DoYouSwearToTellTheTruth,AndNothingButTheTruth,SoHelpYouGod?
  • Judge: Answer him?
  • Bailiff: DoYouSwearToTellTheTruth,AndNothingButTheTruth,SoHelpYouGod?
  • Harmon: No.
  • Judge: What?
  • Harmon: I can't understand a thing he's saying!
  • Judge: He's asking if you swear...
  • Harmon: No, but I know all the words.
  • Harmon: [after being knocked out by Margie] Oh, do you believe in love at first sight?
  • Margie: Scram! You big lug!
  • Judge: Were you or were you not attacked by this boy, before me?
  • Harmon: Before you? When'd he attack you?
  • Judge: Were you attacked by this boy in front of me!
  • Harmon: Where were you standing?
  • Judge: Stop evading the the question!
  • Margie: Oh, the duck looks beautiful!
  • Harmon: Oh, and so do you.
  • Margie: Gee, what a swell joint this is.
  • Harmon: Joint?
  • Margie: [Looks up at the crystal chandelier] Ain't that the berry!
  • Harmon: Berry?
  • Margie: Say, how long have you had this dump?
  • Judge: Mr. Harmon, are you hard of hearing?
  • Harmon: Were you speaking to me?
  • Judge: YES! ARE YOU HARD OF HEARING?
  • Harmon: No, are you?
  • Poggle: Are all these kids yours or is this a picnic?
  • Tenament Mother: They're mine, thank you.
  • Poggle: Don't thank me!
  • Harmon: Is he driving in the street?
  • Poggle: Yes and he's a very good driver. He drove a tank in the war.
  • Harmon: Well, the war's over and I'm no tank!
  • Harmon: There should be a law against this!
  • Poggle: Well, there is one, but, you'd never know it.
  • Butch: [Clipper hands over a stolen wallet] That's a great kid. You got all the makings of a red-hot. How'd we make out here? Three hundred. Three-fifty. Sixty. Seventy-five. Stick around. Here. Here's your split kid.
  • Clipper: A fin! Gee, Butch, you're a great guy!
  • Butch: Okay, Clipper. Stick to me and I'll make a big shot out of ya.
  • Margie: Clipper Kelly, I'm sick and tired of getting you outta jams. I'd poke you in the nose right here in the street if I wasn't a lady.
  • Butch: Aw, lay off him, Margie. He didn't do nothin'.
  • Margie: If it wasn't for you he wouldn't be in all these scraps.
  • Butch: [to Clipper] Don't worry kid, you're all right. You hear me? I'm tellin' ya. You're all right.
  • Margie: And I'm tellin' ya he ain't!
  • Margie: You lay a hand on my brother and I'll mop up the sidewalk with you!
  • Harmon: Well, he slapped your face.
  • Margie: Well, it's my face, ain't it!
  • Harmon: Well, I didn't know you liked it.
  • Harmon: I'm gonna come down here and see how you people live.
  • Margie: Well, we ain't no zoo!
  • Harmon: I want to do somethin' for these kids down here.
  • Margie: Say, I've met your kind before and you're too polite to be up to any good.
  • Margie: Licked before you start, huh! What kind of a man are ya? Brace up!
  • Margie: Can't you think of something heroic for him to do?
  • Poggle: Yeah, he could knock Dempsey out. But, Dempsey isn't here.
  • Margie: Let him knock you out!
  • Poggle: Can't be done.
  • Margie: Why not?
  • Poggle: I'm out already.
  • Margie: What's the matta with ya? Where's your backbone? Get in there and sock 'em one! Don't let 'em make fool outta ya!
  • Clipper: Say, Butch, you don't mean - real stick-ups? With a rod and everything?
  • Butch: Sure, I do.
  • Clipper: Oh, but, listen. Butch, I don't, I don't wanna get...
  • Butch: Now... you better do what Papa tells ya.
  • Poggle: Haven't you got about enough now?
  • Harmon: Margie doesn't come to dinner every night.
  • Poggle: Well, what are you gonna do? Feed her Phonograph records?
  • Poggle: What's the matter with you? Are you delirious?
  • Harmon: No.
  • Poggle: Well, why don't you marry the girl then and get her off of your mind.
  • Harmon: Oh, that's what I want to do.
  • Harmon: [Recording his marriage proposal to Margie, Harmon doesn't know how to start; so, Poggle shows him a series of Sheet Music. Harmon reads and records the song titles] My Fate is in your hands - You brought a new kind of love to me - You're driving me crazy - If I had a girl like you - I'd climb the highest mountain - My one and only - I want to make you mine - Body and soul - Till the sands of the desert grow cold - What'll I do
  • [Poogle next shows him the sheet music to "Yes! We have no bananas"]
  • Harmon: I'd like to kick you right in the pants.
  • Poggle: Now, here's your proposal, see. Tonight, when the lights are low and Margie's up to your house, play that for her on the phonograph.
  • Harmon: There's a man undressing a girl in a Chevrolet.
  • Poggle: He'd have a tougher time in an Austin.
  • Margie: Come on, honey. The duck is gettin' cold!
  • Margie: What would you like to do, Harmon?

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