Sharknado 5: Global Swarming

Let me start off this review by stating that I legitimately enjoyed Sharknado 1-4. I found them to be quite entertaining with their fast-paced style, but Sharknado 5 makes the mistake of being too over-the-top without being as original as the previous films, making it a chore to sit through. Sharknado 5 starts off with an Indiana Jones parody and slowly unravels as the Sharknado is able to warp around, causing damage all over the globe as Fin and April chase after it. There are a few memorable moments but a lot of it is pretty forgettable, and the sheer ridiculousness of the whole film is it's downfall since the whole thing just feels like a bunch of dumb random moments sewn together. By the end of the film I was exhausted and just couldn't care as Fin and the Sharknado popped up in different places, unlike previous entries in the series where I was generally having fun watching the silly chaos unfold on screen until the credits rolled. I can't really recommend this film unless you are dead-set on going through the entire series, in which case you're probably going to see this anyway. But to anyone else I would recommend just watching one of the first 4 films instead.

I love the ridiculousness of these films. They are clearly for a specific fan base. The only problem I have with all the movies is BORING and LIFELESS Tara Reid. She has minimal lines for a reason I guess. Still she brings no energy to the film and I think they would be better off without her.

This movie continues further into be so horrible, ridiculous, and stupid that is entertaining, enjoyable, creative, and glorious. Not the best, but great. Sharknado was originally a cheesy shark movie with a tornado, but this franchise has gone berserk. All hell breaks lose in this movie, but I love how this ends and cant wait for Sharknado 6, this movie honestly seems like a set up for sharknado the final chapter or something. This movie was hilarious and great with all it's bad movie elements, but it is obvious they acknowledge that and go for it. I still like the story somewhat and the characters even though it is mostly ridiculous.

This cheesy and deliberately stupid franchise puts a smile on my face, so right there that means a 5-star baseline. Sure, Tara Reid (she of the famous nip slip) is terrible here; she looks bad (awful hair and costumes) and her "acting" doesn't help. It's Ian Zierling that holds things together; he plays his part straight and that's key.

Cassandra Scerbo is always fun to watch (and easy on the eyes); at least she got to wear some decent outfits. There are many cameos as one would expect; they fit with the parody (and self-parody) flavor.

The films are getting increasingly ridiculous, but realistically, what choice do they have? OF COURSE the novelty is wearing off!

Regarding the detractors; no one forced them to watch. The folks who like these films might just be sick of pretentious films (and actors).

The Sharknado films gleefully reference and/or steal from other films, but at least they do it openly. So there.

I'm giving this film a one-star penalty for being non-memorable. It made me smile, but just a few hours later, I don't recall why (in any detail). That's a problem. So that's only four (4) stars total.

DRIFTING OFF-TOPIC (for most, not all)

{Welcome to my Under the Silver Lake (UTSL) distributed essay. This is Part 3. Part 2 was attached to my (4-star) review of The Phantom.}

Under the Silver Lake (2018) is a strange film with an unsolved (audience) puzzle that references dozens of other films, often in very subtle ways. Sharknado V has many tie-ins.

One blatant reference is the Egyptian-style eye above the UTSL bunker-tomb -- it's right out of Sharknado 5. You can see the shark-gills in UTSL, but they're slightly smudged so you won't notice unless you look. The eye itself is a mirror image but otherwise identical.

Another blatant reference is Sam's pool, which is shaped like a shark's dorsal fin (from the camera angle used). Also, Comic-Man has a set of shark jawbones.

In UTSL, the afterlife cultists spend 6 months underground. Well, Ian Ziering, the star of the Sharknado movies, was in Six Months Later (2005, short).

For sake of brevity, I'll just tell you that this seems to lead to John Heard (George the barstool guy in Sharknado). His relevance is arguably supported by his role in The Nurse (2014); this could explain why Riki Lindhome wore a nurse's outfit in one scene.

In any case, John Heard was in O (2001). Take a look at the movie poster -- see the guy holding up the giant yellow letter "O"? This is referenced by the UTSL scene where the girls in the white VW rabbit get out to attend a rooftop pool party. One of them briefly holds a yellow doughnut-shaped pool float over her head. There's another pointer to this moment -- see my (9-star) review of LOTR -- The Two Towers (rw9878533).

Sharknado's have ruined America but now they are threatening to take out Europe, starting in London where coincidentally Fin and April are currently visiting.

More of the same at the last film(s) but a lot more silly, more bad acting, more bad dialogue, more of a stupid story, more tongue in cheek humour, more ridiculous cameo appearances, more more more of exactly the same to the point that it's getting a bit dull for me. The scariest thing about this film was the plastic surgery on show, it was like a Freak show of warnings about what plastic surgery can do to a person - some of the crap CGI sharks looked more attractive than the cast. The best in this series was the first film, since then it's gone downhill to the point that I'd suggest this is the weakest in the series - despite being the most up to date and sparkly. I can only give this film a 5 out of 10 because it's all been done before and brings nothing new to the table.

None offensive, borderline entertainment, requires no brain, pretty pictures.