Zitate

Hosting a talk show is the easiest job anybody ever had.

Beware of assuming that credentials establish intelligence.

We pride ourselves on the high moral standards of our programmes and I mean that sincerely. We don't resort to sex or crime or violence or drinking...on the programmes.

If my mind ever listened to what my mouth said, I'd have a lot of accounting to do.

Nothing is quite as funny as the unintended humor of reality.

[on Milton Berle] He's been on TV for years and I finally figured out the reason for his success. He never improved.

Humor is a social lubricant that helps us get over some of the bad spots.

Radio is the theater of the mind; television is the theater of the mindless.

If the Old Testament were a reliable guide in the matter of capital punishment, half the people in the United States would have to be killed.

In a rational society we would want our presidents to be teachers. In our actual society we insist they be cheerleaders.

I used to be a heavy gambler. But now I just make mental bets. That's how I lost my mind.