Dada Da Dada Da Dum

From the 95,000 limericks in the Jim McWilliam collection, endless new limericks can be created through Queneau assembly. Here are ten.

He'd been non-fluent since childhood days. Sought her return from the dais. Down on all fours And tallied up scores And her eyes had a permanent glaze. Our volunteer leader named Jim Who, naked, went in for a swim. Poll's crackers and cheese I'll get on my knees... "But none with so splendid a limb." Where will this folly all end? By Senators loathe to offend. If it looked good he'd fuck it. Where my aunt would sit From her house down the road at the bend. There was a Hermit named Dave They gently squat down on my stave. And admit that my verse When they're having the curse While pretending to be her love slave. Ever been showered with Lemonade? "Let's kill all the lawyers; they've made" Her belief he was sterile "Because I'm sterile." Lest he's stuck with a whore that's decayed.

Woe is me; I'm virginal -- true. My Edith tells me that we're through. All he could as a buyer. Says I, "He's a liar." But how 'bout when a horse falls off you? There once was a guy named Jim Vance Who used penis instead of a lance. We've found a man's tool In front of our school Were concave and stayed still when I'd dance. There once was a lezzie from France "I'll be taking a much different stance." For money in my bank As you dream-chewed his crank? When she helloed, said my name is Lance. In days well before old King Fahd To smile on Seattle and nod Not the number I fear Is sucking us clear Top it off with a stout lightning rod. An agile young man of Seattle Erm's come back again from the cattle. I went to a bar Makes the woods ring afar. And fell deeply in love with his rattle.

New limericks are generated every five minutes. You can get six a day by following @DadaLimericks on Twitter. Or, take it highbrow.

Rhymes are calculated using the CMU Pronouncing Dictionary. There are 1155 distinct sounds for the "A" rhyme and 1035 for the "B" rhyme.

Inspired by Dr. Andy Holding on The Science of Fiction.